Title: Love in Pieces

Pairings: Jim/Spock

Summary: Love doesn’t always form easily sometimes it comes in bits and pieces.

A/N: based off Star Trek 2009 and the original series. Gotta love Alternative Universes hoho!  Unbetaed so read at your own risk ^^

 

Chapter 1: Never Trust the Environment

 

An Inferno. He felt like he was surrounded by it, every time he tried to breathe, or move a certain way.  The arms around him were so hot that he felt the heat all the way down to his very bones.  Muscular thighs supported his weight, and he moaned lowly, as he was rocked against a firm hardness.  He flipped his head back to remove some of the blond sweaty strands from his forehead and gazed down at his captor.  Blackness stared back at him, rimmed in dark brown.  His captor’s eyes reflected lust, need, want, and madness.  He tilted his head to the side and felt firm teeth nibble at his neck.  A gasp escaped him, and the inferno inside him blazed hotter.  Sudden need gripped him and he let out a low whimper.  A firm hand grasped his chin and warm lips were slanted over his own.  He opened his mouth and let the hot tongue slide against his own.  A low moan left his captors mouth and he couldn’t help, but tighten his grip on slim shoulders. 

 

The world tilted suddenly as his back hit the lush ground.  His hands slid up into silky black hair and he scratched the scalp lightly.  A purr left his captor’s lips and he smiled.  His captor pulled back suddenly and he cried out at in loss.  A gentle touch on his lips silenced his cry and he blinked.  For a moment sane dark brown eyes stared at him sadly, before the madness consumed his captor once more.  Lips were suddenly everywhere and he jerked in surprise.  A low keening moan escaped him and he dug his fingers into the lush green grass.  He arched his back as a moist tongue licked its way down his belly.  When the hot mouth engulfed him, he let out a shout.  His captor held him down by one hand as he thrashed from the intensity of it.  Suddenly the torment stopped and a hot body was draped over him. 

 

Opening eyes he didn’t know he had closed he blinked dazedly up at his captor.  Warm lips nuzzled his gently and he nipped at them lazily.   A hot tongue easily slid into his mouth and he gripped his captor closer.  Fingers slid teasingly down his thighs and down below.  He squirmed at the odd feeling and his captor rained soothing kisses on his brow. His world tilted again when his legs were lifted and something hard pressed at the center of his being.  For a moment time stood still as hazel met dark brown and then with a sudden thrust the stare was broken.  He gasped at the shock and pain.  It burned so much that he panted heavily when trying to catch his breath.  Long fingers were placed on the side of his face and he blinked trying to see through the hot tears.

 

In a flash of blinding light he was suddenly inside his own mind and he was confused. He could distantly feel pain from the sudden penetration, but not too much.  A ghostly shape began to take form before him and then surrounded him.  He gasped at the strange feelings that swept through him and he tried to grab the ghostly form.  Strange words began to echo around him, but he couldn’t understand it.  He tried to figure out what was being said, but something else caught his attention.  Outside of his mind his captor had begun to move and something was happening to him. He could feel the pain slowly fading away and it was being replaced by pleasure.   The ghostly form began to spiral around him faster and faster, while colors trailed in its wake.  His body was slowly starting to tighten from his captors thrust and he could feel the end was coming near.  When it came he was caught off guard, and his mind exploded in a riot of emotions, words, and colors.  The ghostly form suddenly wrapped tightly around him and he welcomed it.  He could feel himself slowly becoming consumed by the ghost and let out an ecstatic cry  The cracks that were always there inside of him were slowly being filled and he knew that he would never be alone again.  Thoughts that weren’t his own were coming through, and as his mind faded into unconsciousness, he heard something that he hoped he would never forget.

 

“We are one and we will never be alone again.”

 

--

 

Grass.  It smelled like grass to Jim, as he moved a bit and let out a groan.  He ached from the top of his head, down to the tips of his toes, and he didn’t know why.  Cracking an eye open, he closed it quickly from the blinding light.  The rays beat down upon him and it made him a bit sleepily.  A sudden shift against his side made Jim crack his eyes open again and look down.  A dark head rested on his chest and he raised a hesitant hand.  Threading his fingers through the hair gently, he smiled at the silky feel.  A warm breeze flowed across his body and that’s when he realized he was naked.  Thoughts crashed through his mind and he suddenly realized whose head was on his chest.  With a loud gasp, Jim jerked his hand away and sat up.  The dark head thumped into his lap and he felt his cheeks heat up.  Carefully grasping the Vulcan’s head, he gently laid him in the grass and stood up.  He backed up a few feet away and looked around.  Clothing was scattered everywhere and he noticed there supplies were nearby.  He couldn’t help but wonder why both him and Spock were naked.  Although judging by the stiffness of his body, and the love bites on Spock’s, he had a bad feeling.  Taking a calming breath, he began to gather there clothes and tried to remember what had happened.

 

They had been sent explore the planet Cirein which had never been explored by the Federation before.  The planet was said to be teaming with life and rich in natural resources.  There mission had been to survey the planet and see if it was suitable for colonization.  It was pretty far away from any star base and yet not to close to any disputed territories.  Jim had been excited about exploring a new world and most of his crew had been enthusiastic about it.  All but his Science and First Officer Spock.  Vulcans were not known to show there emotions, but Jim could swear he had seen curiosity, deep in those dark brown eyes.  There had been 10 people assigned to the away team and they had split into groups of twos after beaming down.  He had been paired off with Spock, and although the two of them were not friends, they at least worked well together. 

 

Sometimes he wondered, why the other Spock had mentioned that they would someday become great friends. He sure as hell didn’t see it, since neither of them got along, and were stubborn to boot.  Shrugging his shoulders, he still couldn’t remember how the situation he found himself in had happened.  He remembered they had separated from the group and had gone exploring.  The forest had been teaming with new and wondrous creatures.  He had loved every minute of it and he remembered watching Spock examine everything with his Tricorder in hand.  Spock’s eyes had gleamed with curiosity as he had examined one thing after another.  He had reminded Jim of a kid in a candy store.

 

Everything had been going fine until hours later when they had been near a strange lake.  The water had been a dark red and the smell from it had reminded Jim of rotten eggs. He had been curious and had gone for a closer look. 

 

“Captain it would be ill advised to venture near the water until we know what is in there,” Spock had told him.

 

Of course he had ignored the warning and had leaned a little to close.  A long slimy tentacle like thing had shot out of the water and grabbed him.  Spock had tried to free him, but both of them had been dragged into the water.  Fortunately the thing had been more curious then hungry and had let them go.  They had both swallowed down a lot of the strange water, but Jim had felt alright.  It wasn’t until few minutes later that whatever they had drunk had begun to affect them both.  Jim remembered looking at Spock and feeling some kind of strange emotion fill him.  Spock had looked pale and a bit sweaty.  Jim had been concerned, but when he touched the Vulcan’s shoulder, he had been surprised when Spock had jerked away.

 

Spock had a look of terror on his face when he had looked at Jim and his words had been a bit garbled. “Pon farr.  It’s…. so….n. What could have…..water….how…….”

 

Jim was unsure what to do. Why was Spock mentioning Pon farr and why did he look so afraid?  It was rare for the Vulcan to show emotion and it made him feel a bit uneasy. 

 

As the day turned into night changes had overtaken them both.  Jim had tried to set up camp, since the landing crew was staying down here for a few days, but it was so hard to think.  Jim felt as high as a kite and yet drunk at the same time.  It made it hard to think or even function properly. Spock was no help either, since every time Jim tried to approach him, the Vulcan would snarl at him.  It was way out of character for Spock, but there was nothing he could do.  He didn’t think about using his communicator for some reason, but then again his thoughts were too jumbled.   Things were gradually getting worse for the two of them and the situation soon changed. 

 

Spock who had been trying to contain the burning inside him, snapped, and lunged for Jim.  The Captain had no chance against a Vulcan’s strength and had crashed to the ground.  Angry lips had crashed against Jim’s and hot fingers had burned into his head.  The last thing he remembered was his mind being overwhelmed by Spock’s lust and then nothing.

 

Letting out a sigh, Jim wondered just what in the hell had been in that water.

 

--

 

Chapter 2: Problems Arise

 

A groan escaped the Vulcan, as he woke up and grasped his head.  Agony rippled through his mind and it felt like his control over his telepathic abilities was gone.  He could feel everything around him and it hurt so much.   The death cry of a creature being killed and exhilaration of another while it ran through the forest.  It was too much for his mind to handle and he let out a whimper.

 

A warm hand was placed on his shoulder and it felt like a switch had been turned off.  Taking a deep breath, Spock let out a relieved sigh.  The emotional overflow was gone and he blinked dazedly.  The touch from that hand was like a balm to his mind and it was soothing.  A voice captured his attention and he turned his head.  Concerned hazel brown eyes gazed down at him and he recognized this man.

 

“Captain what is happening?”

 

 The human smiled at him lopsidedly and said, “I am unsure Commander.  Are you alright? You seemed to be in pain.”

 

Spock raised a hesitant hand and grasped his Captain’s hand.  “I will be as long as you don’t stop touching me.” 

 

He saw his Captain start and look at him in surprise.  Letting out a tired sigh, he sat up slowly and felt the blanket covering him slide down.  He blinked a little, when he realized he was laying on a pallet of blankets, and that he was naked.  Most disconcerting.  He could feel the impatience to know coming off his Captain and he almost smiled in humor.

 

“I am afraid that if you stop touching me Captain I will be overwhelmed again, since my control on my telepathic abilities is how do you humans say it, blown to bits?”

 

“Blown to bits?” Jim said in astonishment.

 

“Yes.  It will take time to recover my control over my abilities and I must have a chance to mediate to do this.” Spock glanced down at himself again and asked in puzzlement, “Although by chance Captain why am I naked? Did I get injured somehow?”

 

Spock watched as an embarrassed flush swept over his Captain’s face and he could feel guilt from him.  Why was the Captain feeling guilty?

 

“I am unsure Commander for you see I err found us both naked and you were laying against my side.” The Captain had dropped his gaze and one of his hands was fiddling with his trouser legs.  “I don’t remember how we ended up that way but…..”

 

“What are you not telling me Captain?”

 

Jim looked him in the eye and said quiet seriously, “I was stiff when I woke up Commander and sore in other places.”

 

It didn’t take very long for Spock to figure out what that meant, and an embarrassed flush almost reached his cheeks and ears.  Luckily he still had control over his bodily functions and stopped it. He did feel a tad stiff now that it was pointed out to him and he noticed teeth marks on his upper left thigh. To know that it was highly probable that he had sexual intercourse with his Captain, and not remember any of it, was very disconcerting. He had never been attracted to the Captain before and this was most displeasing.  It was not unknown for Vulcans to take a male lover, but he had never shown any inclinations towards wanting one.   He wondered just what had caused this situation since his memories were a bit hazy.  What was most disquieting was why his captain’s touch helped to control his abilities.  It was highly illogical for his Captain to suddenly be able to do this and he wondered what had caused it.

 

Deciding meditation was the key Spock turned to Jim and asked, “I require meditation if you do not mind sitting close to me Captain?”

 

“Sure Mister Spock I don’t mind,” a humorous look shown in hazel eyes, “as long as you put some clothes on!”

 

--

 

Jim settled down trying to get comfortable without disturbing Spock.  It was weird sitting so close to his First Officer and letting him hold his hand.  Although it had been even weirder waking up naked next to him.  He still wondered once more about what had been in that water and why his memories were still so vague.  He glanced over at Spock and watched him for a moment.  Spock was sitting cross legged on the ground, with one hand resting on his thigh, and the other gripping Jim’s hand. 

 

The Vulcan’s eyes were closed and his breathing was slow.  He could tell that Spock was deep in meditation and he wonder if he was disturbing him.  Vulcan’s normally didn’t like to touch people, since they were telepathic race, with a slight touch of empathy, and it must be annoying to be around humans all the time.  A grin appeared on his face the more he thought about.  Compared to the logical and emotional less Vulcan’s, humans must appear to be a jumbled mess.  Humans liked to leap into fool hardy situations and of course let there emotions lead them into all sorts of trouble.  Vulcan’s on the other hand liked to think things through and apply logic to everything.  It brought a smile to his lips as he sat there and thought about it.  A sudden thought popped into his mind and he groaned.  He hadn’t reminded Spock about the water they had drunk and he almost cursed.  It didn’t appear that Spock had remembered it, but now wasn’t a good time to tell him.  He decided to wait until First Officer was done meditating and then he would tell him.

 

The day was passing slowly as Jim let out a yawn and he decided to lay down.  He was carefully not to move his hand as he stretched out on the pallet.  It was warm under the sun and he smiled.  He had a feeling that Spock would be mediating for a few more hours and he might as well take nap. Closing his eyes he soon slipped into slumber.

 

--

 

The orderly landscape in his mind was in disarray, as Spock slowly began to put it back in order.  Something had disrupted his mind and he didn’t like it.  Looking around, he noticed bright splashes of color here and there that had him curious.  Normally his mind held shades of grey and green, but theses splashes were vivid in color.  They had never been there before and it was fascinating.  He wondered if they had appeared after his telepathic control over his abilities had been destroyed. 

 

Drifting closer to it, he raised a ghostly hand, and lightly touched the colors.  A feeling of surprise swept through him and then denial.  It couldn’t be what he thought it was, but the feelings he got from the colors confirmed it.  Concentrating, the colors began to form into a long rope of red, and he grasped it firmly.   Thoughts that were not his own swept through the link and he sighed.  It was true then what this color represented, but how to tell the Captain? Although it did explain how the Captain’s touch helped to control his telepathic and empathic abilities.  In Vulcan society the touch of ones bond mate could act as a barrier to all outside influences for a time.  Even if Jim wasn’t doing it subconsciously, the bond was helping the human to protect him.  Not even the greatest minds in Vulcan could truly describe what those who had a bond would do for each other. 

 

Spock still pondered on how to explain this situation to his Captain. How did one go and say to someone they were not friends with that they had bonded?  It was not a good situation to be in and Spock was not very happy about it.  And to make matters worse, he had raped his Captain by overwhelming the human with his mind.  It was a most unpleasant situation to be in and he knew that Jim had a right to prosecute him for this most grievous offense.  Spock was unsure how to handle this situation and would need to consult his Captain about it.

 

Dropping the red rope, he begun to sift through his memories to find out how this happened.  It took time and much effort, but he finally found what he was looking for.  The memories were a bit ragged and torn but still there.

 

Luckily or perhaps unluckily for Vulcans there minds were photographic, so while humans might forget things even when they were drunk, Vulcan never did.  Spock watched the memories replay for him and shame gripped him.  It had been the water which had induced the Pon farr and he had sated his Plak Tow on his Captain’s body.  He watched, as his powerful mind overwhelmed the human’s, and how they sated there lust on each other.  Each piece of memory was played back to Spock in vivid detail, and if he could have flushed in the meld, he would have. 

 

Continuing to re-watch his memories, he analyzed the new situation he was in.  At the moment he felt no feeling of commitment or even lust for the Captain.    The bond between them was weak for now, but he knew as time went on it would grow stronger.   Once the bond stabilized and grew stronger, they would not be able to undo it, and this displeased him greatly.  A bond with a human male would create no children and neither of them would be happy to be stuck in an unwanted bond.  Perhaps a trip to New Vulcan would be best to consult a mind healer when time was permitted and see about the removal of the bond. 

 

Checking over his mind one more time for any other discrepancies, Spock slowly opened his eyes.  The first thing he noticed was the tanned hand he was still holding and how it stood out against his own pale green skin.  He wondered if it had something to do with the pigments in there skins or the different suns that resided over there worlds.  The Captain’s hand was several degrees cooler then his own and it was a bit soothing.

 

“I see that you are done meditating.  Everything straightened out Commander?” Jim asked sleepily.

 

Spock regarded his Captain for a moment in contemplation and noticed he was sprawled out next to him. “Yes Captain, although I have discovered something that will require us both being a bit discreet about it, until it has been resolved.”

 

“Well get on it with it man, it can’t be any worse then any other situations we have been.”

 

Spock couldn’t help but think that was an understatement.  The other situations they had been were life or death, but this one was more personal in nature.

 

“We are bonded sir.”

 

“Bonded?”

 

Spock watched as shock flashed across his Captain features.  Feeling more in control of his abilities, he released there clasped hands and watched as Jim jumped to his feet.  He wasn’t too surprised when the captain started to pace.

 

Jim began to pace faster as the words suck into his head.  Bonded.  Just how the hell did that happen and when? He had heard of Vulcan’s bonding before and he knew what it meant.  It was a lifetime commitment that was usually beneficial to both parties if the bond was wanted.  Although in this situation, Jim didn’t want to be stuck in a loveless bond with someone he didn’t even consider a close friend, and a male to boot.  He liked women with there luscious curves and full plump lips thank you very much.  It was an unpleasant situation to be in.  Sliding to a halt, he whirled around and pinned Spock with his eyes.

 

“It was the water wasn’t it?”

 

Spock inclined his head.  “It is highly logical that the water affected us both and induced a kind of Pon farr in me.  From what I can recall after drinking the water, it made the Plak Tow unbearable and since you were the closest being…..”

 

“You jumped my bones like a buck on a doe in heat”

 

“I wouldn’t be so coarse Captain, but that is an accurate statement.”

 

Jim couldn’t help but think this was an ironic situation to be in.  He had sex with his First Officer and yet he felt nothing for the other man.  Not that he could remember anything and he was partially curious if it was any good.  Shrugging his shoulders, he pushed that thought away and sighed.   

 

“I must apologize for this situation to have happened Captain; I should have stopped you from going near the water.” 

 

“Don’t blame yourself Spock, it was I who was to curious, and I should have heeded your warning.”

 

Spock seemed to be contemplating something for a moment and Jim waited for him to speak.  He had never seen his First Officer so hesitant before and he began to grown concerned. 

 

Impatience soon reared its ugly head.  “Out with it Commander what else is bothering you?”

 

He watched as the Vulcan glanced down at the ground. “I am afraid that in effect I have raped you Sir.”

 

“What?”

 

“During Pon farr I was consumed with the mating and in effect I was driven to mate.  In this state I overtook your mind and forced you to have intercourse with me.”

 

Jim didn’t know what to think of this situation or how to respond to it.  From what little he knew of Pon farr once the individually was in this state they could no longer form rational thought.   The need to mate ruled them, until the Plak Tow was extinguished, and the bond was formed.  He couldn’t blame Spock for something he had not done willingly and yet he did feel a little uncomfortable about it.   Although since he couldn’t remember the rape happening he didn’t know how he should feel. Perhaps they should both discuss this issue with Bones and go from there.  Although explaining something like this with the Doctor was going to be as uncomfortable as hell.

 

“It is alright Spock.” Jim raised his hand to stop Spock from speaking.  “We will have to discuss this situation with McCoy and go from there. Although that’s going to be as pleasant as kissing a Klingon.”

 

Spock sighed heavily. “Very well Captain, I will try to be a willing participate in the discussion.”

 

 “But what will we do about the Bond?” Jim couldn’t help but ask.

 

Spock stood up and began to pack there things.  Keeping busy would help distract him from the bond and what had happened during it.  If he thought about it to much, he would think about the discussion they would soon have with the good Doctor, which would be most unpleasant. “Logically we should finish our expedition here and when time is permitting go to New Vulcan to consult a mind healer.”

 

“Will they be able to help us?”  Jim asked as he began to help Spock pack a way there gear.

 

“I believe so.”

 

“Then let’s finish this expedition and get the hell out of here.”

 

--

 

Chapter 3: Dreams

 

“Bridge to Captain Kirk.”

 

Jim jerked awake and panted raggedly.  Feeling groggy as hell, he swiped his sweaty hair from his face and scrubbed his eyes.   He hit the comm button by his bunk and replied, “Kirk here. What is it Lieutenant?”

 

“Captain there is a message from Starfleet command. Shall I patch it through to your quarters?”

 

“Go ahead Uhura.”

 

Exhaustion rippled through his frame and he let out a tired yawn.  For the last few months he had been having vivid dreams that would snap him awake in the dead of night.  It was dreams of him and Spock in a passionate embrace.  The dreams were sometimes so intense that when he awoke from them, the Vulcan’s name would spill from his lips.  It was highly frustrating to keep waking up in this manner, not to mention he was not getting any rest.  He cursed the bond for this and cursed the bloody water on the planet Cirein.

Stretching, he slid from his comfortable bunk and padded into his office.  He sat down behind his desk and hit a button on the key pads.  The monitor lit up from sleep mode and an older woman with white hair appeared on the screen. 

 

“Hello Captain Kirk, this is Admiral Yin and I am sorry, but at this time I cannot grant your crew shore leave.  I need for you to go to the planet Sersie II and negotiate a treaty with there people.”

 

Jim closed his eyes and gritted his teeth in frustration.   It had been months since the last time his crew had taken a break and they were all under stress.  Constant exploration far from home could wear on anyone, especially in uncharted dangerous territory.  What was even more frustrating about being denied, was that during there shore leave, he was going to ask for the leave to be on New Vulcan.  The colony was not that far from there present position and only there could this bond be broken.  They hadn’t had time to go to New Vulcan, since the bonding incident on Cirein.  One mission after another had kept rolling in and there hadn’t been any time.

 

Opening his eyes, Jim listened to the rest of the message and then shut it off. He stood up and wondered if he should return to the bunk for a little more sleep.  He glanced at the chronometer and with a grimace, realized he had only been sleeping for about three hours.  No wonder he felt so tired and frustrated.  Perhaps a workout in the gym would help wear him out and he would be able to sleep.  Standing up, he quickly returned to his sleeping area and got dressed. Once in his gym clothes, he walked out of his quarters and straight for the turbo lift.  Around this time most of his crew was asleep at this hour, or on duty, so the corridors were empty.  It was a quiet ride to the next deck, and when he arrived at the gym, there was know one there.  Glad to be alone for once, he quickly set out to exhaust himself as much as possible. 

 

His muscles burned, as he lifted the bar over his head, and his arm shook a little from the strain.  Maybe the weights were heavier then he was used to, but at least it made him concentrate more on what he was doing.  No time for stray thoughts or any chance to think about those dreams.  He heard the computer’s voice warning him that he was starting to strain himself, but he ignored it.  Just a little more and he would be exhausted enough to sleep. 

 

“Jim what the hell is wrong with you?”

 

Letting out a surprised gasp, the weights slammed onto the supports, and Jim blinked in surprise.  Standing over him, and with a dangerous glint in blue his eyes, was his CMO Leonard McCoy.  The glint had him worried and he knew a tongue lashing was about to commence. Swinging his legs over the bench, he grabbed his towel and started to pat his sweaty face.

 

“Hello Bones what are you doing awake at this ungodly hour?”

 

“Taking a break from reports in sickbay and trying to keep a foolish Captain from ending up in there.” McCoy snarled angrily.  “Just what the hell do you think you are doing Jim, trying to become Hercules or something?”

 

A cocky grin was Jim’s answer and he watched as a red flush stained the doctor’s cheeks.  An explosion was imminent and he didn’t want to really deal with an enraged McCoy right now.  Thinking quickly, he smiled charmingly and said, “No I am trying to keep my weight down just as the Doctor ordered.”

 

A finger was waggled in Jim’s face. “Don’t try to pull the wool over my eyes Jim, I wasn’t born yesterday.” A concerned look appeared in blue eyes. “You are losing too much weight and not getting enough sleep, judging by them black circles under your eyes. Just what is the matter Jim?”

 

A sigh escaped Jim and he scratched his head distractedly.  “It’s the dreams Bones they have been occurring a lot lately.”

 

“Dreams what dreams?”

 

 “Dreams about being with Spock in a sexual way.”

 

“And you didn’t think to tell me this at our weekly meetings with Spock?”  McCoy all but hissed at him.

 

Jim sighed as his CMO went into a ranting spree about foolish Captain’s and a few other foul words.  For months he had weekly sessions with Bones and Spock.  How they both felt about the situation they were in.  Was Jim okay about being a rape victim?  How were they dealing with there bond?  It was so much talking and sharing that it was slowly driving him mad.  He knew that the discussions were beneficial in dealing with what had happened, but after a while he was getting tired of talking about.  Of course he knew he couldn’t just ignore what happened, but dammit he was tired of it all.  

 

Raising a hand, he watched as McCoy ended his tirade and glared at him.  Taking a deep breath, Jim prepared for a battle.  “I am sorry Bones I should have told you about the dreams, and it was wrong to keep it from you, but I have spilled so much of myself at those therapy meetings that even I need to keep some stuff to myself.”

 

McCoy was about to speak but Jim shook his head.  “You know I am right Bones.”

 

“Alright I will let it slide this time, but I want you to tell me how those dreams made you feel.”

 

Jim thought about those dreams and he wasn’t to sure how he felt.  They had been pretty intense and left him feeling highly aroused after waking up.  He was a very sexual being and stimulating dreams could do that to anyone.   The more he thought about his dreams, the more confused he felt about Spock being in them.     He wasn’t to sure how he felt about this, since he normally dreamed about women.  In fact he had never been attracted to a male before and was wondering if the bond was causing this. It was such a confusing situation to be in, that eventually Jim threw his hands in up in the air in frustration.

 

“I don’t know Bones and that’s what’s driving me insane! I can’t sleep because the dreams are every night and I don’t know what to think of Spock anymore.”

 

A calm hand settled on his shoulder and Jim glanced at Bones.  He had been pacing so much and ranting like a madman, that he was all the way on the other side of the room. 

 

“Perhaps you should talk to Spock about this.” McCoy grimaced a bit at him. “Even though me and the green blooded hobgoblin don’t get along, he might be able to help you in this situation.”

 

Jim let out a short laugh.  “And how do I tell him that I am having lust filled dreams about him in different positions?”

 

“Gah Jim don’t give me any details!” McCoy yelled angrily.  “I just ate a while ago and I don’t need images like that upsetting my full stomach!”

 

A snort left Jim, as he listened to Bones rant and rave about the injustice of it all.  Perhaps it was time to bring this up with Spock, although it wasn’t going to be easy.  Sometimes talking to Spock was like talking to a computer.  Sighing he decided he would go hunt Spock down after Bones was done ranting.

 

--

 

Red light glowed on Spock’s face as he gazed down in the black fire pot on the floor.  He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. For hours he had been meditating and for hours he could not concentrate.  Many things were distracting him from his logical thought process and the bond was at the forefront.  He could feel it growing a little stronger as each day went by and the chance of breaking it safely was slipping away.  If the bond continued to strengthen, it might cause them considerably harm, and no mind healer would subject them to that. 

 

Breaking a bond was usually the last resort for a mated Vulcan pair and only under extreme circumstances.   Usually it would happen because one of the pair could not have children or it was mutual agreement to end it.  The more he thought about this unwanted bond the more emotional he became.  He could feel his control on his emotions unraveling and he closed his eyes tightly.  Emotions were not the way of his people and he would not let it overtake him now.  Logic.  He must control his emotions and let his logic prevail.  Taking another deep breath, he exhaled slowly and let the emotional turmoil slowly slip out of him.  He was succeeding until a loud beeping sound caught his attention.

 

“Enter.”

 

Spock watched as Captain Kirk strolled into his quarters.   He could feel unease and embarrassment from the human through their bond. 

 

“What can I do for you Captain?”

 

Hesitation showed briefly on Jim’s face before disappearing.  “Oh I can come back at another time since I see you are busy.”

 

“No it is quiet alright Captain.” Spock carefully snuffed out the firepot and stood.  Motioning towards his office, he waited for the Captain to sit down in front of his desk.  “Would you like some tea?”

 

“No thank you.”

 

Spock inclined his head and walked around his desk.  Once he was seated, he looked at his Captain thoughtfully.  He watched as Jim fiddled with his fingers for a bit and it seemed that he was nervous.  It was most odd to see such a confident human showing this emotion.  Most curious. Suddenly piercing hazel eyes stared at him and he blinked. 

 

“I wanted to ask you something Spock. Will this bond cause me to lust after you?”

 

The words were said so quickly that it took a few moments for them to sink in.  Spock lifted up an eyebrow.  “The bond will cause lust, but that is only during Pon farr, which happens every seven years.  A mated pair will use the bond to help make the burning easier to bear, but you should not being feeling any lust at this time.”

 

When the captain still looked a bit uneasy Spock decided to explain the bond a bit more. “It will bring the bonded pair closer mentally and as you humans say spiritually.  There are other benefits, such as being able to speak to each other telepathically, and knowing when the other is danger.”

 

“Does it cause love as well?”

 

“Love?” A perplexed expression crossed Spock’s face for a moment, before he remembered hearing this term before.  He had heard his mother explaining to his father about love. Vulcans did not use this term when thinking about another.  There was a sense of affection, but it was deeper and richer.  Vulcans usually mated because there minds were compatible and not because of emotions.  “Ah this is a human emotion.  No the bond will not cause you to fall in love. Vulcans don’t feel love like you humans do.” 

 

“Ah I see.”

 

The Captain looked confused, but he didn’t ask anymore questions.  Waiting patiently, Spock glanced at the chronometer and noticed he was due on Delta shift soon

 

“If there is nothing else sir, I must prepare for my shift.”

 

“Of course Commander.”

 

Spock watched as the Captain stood up and swiftly strode towards the door.  The human paused at the door and Spock wondered if there was perhaps something else he needed to say.

 

“Thank you Spock for answering my questions.”

 

“Of course Captain.”

 

The door slid closed behind the human and Spock wondered about the late night visit.  He pondered on why the Captain had asked those questions, but he had not wanted to pry.  Shrugging his shoulders, he decided that if the Captain spoke to him again about the bond, he would ask.

 

--

 

Outside Spock’s quarters Jim let out a quiet sigh.  It appeared that the lustful dreams he was having had been from his own mind.  He didn’t know why he was lusting after his first officer and now he was more confused then before. Maybe he was remembering the rape?  But if it had been rape then why were the dreams so passionate?  And what did Spock mean about Vulcans not feeling love like humans do?  Tiredness overtook him and he decided to figure this out later.

 

--

 

Chapter 4: Negotations

 

The M class planet Sersie II is a lush world similar to earth with its mountainous regions, numerous forests, and majority of it covered in oceans.  It was inhabited by a race called the Sersians who looked reptilian and were highly advanced in space travel.  There world was known for there medical, botany, and the export of precious stones, and metals.  The Federation had been trying to negotiate a peace treaty with this race for years and it was finally coming true.  Hence, why the Enterprise was being sent there so suddenly and being denied there shore leave.

 

Jim sat in the command chair and gazed at the view screen.  The planet looked really beautiful from space and it made him feel a little homesick.  It reminded him of Earth which he had not seen in several months.  He wasn’t looking forward to having to negotiate a treaty with the Sersians, since he hated diplomatic functions.  The thought of fake smiling, and listening to boring conversations, for days on end, made him squirm.  Luckily he wasn’t going down there alone, since he was taking Bones and Spock with him.  No reason to suffer alone, although he just knew Spock would enjoy himself.

 

“Captain I am receiving a communication from the planet, shall I patch it through?”

 

“Go ahead Lieutenant Uhura.”

 

The view screen began to change and a reptilian humanoid appeared.  He was a dark green in color, with red eyes, and had small horns that curved into his long flowing black mane.  A blue robe encased his form and he appeared muscular.  A hand was placed on the Sersian’s chest and it bowed.

 

“I am the Ambassador Perloian of Sersie II and I bid you welcome to our home world.”

 

Jim stood up from his chair and returned the bow.  “On behalf of my crew I thank you for your welcome. Is it alright if we beam down to the surface?”

 

“Of course, I will have one of my men send you the coordinates.”  Perloian said pleasantly. “We await your arrival on our planet Captain Kirk.”

 

When the communication ended everyone on the bridge began to talk excitedly. It was the first time any of them had ever seen a Sersian or even possibly set foot on the planet.  The federation had sent negotiators and diplomats before, but known of them had been allowed on the planet.  All communications had been only on the view screen, so this was an important day for the crew.   If things went well during negations, the crew was hopeful that they might get a chance to go down there for a day to explore, and to interact with the inhabitants.

 

Jim raised a hand. “Alright everyone back to your stations.”  Turning around he smiled at his First Officer.  “Spock come with me.  Sulu you have the conn.”

 

“Aye sir.”

 

Striding away from the chair, he headed over to the turbo lift and waited for Spock to enter.  Once the door closed he looked at his First Officer.

 

“Thoughts Commander?”

 

Spock glanced at his Captain and arched an eyebrow.  “They appear to be an interesting species and are highly intelligent.  From what I have ascertained they are farther along in advancement in the medical field then most in the federation.”

 

A chuckle escaped Jim.  “I bet you can’t wait to pick there brains Mister Spock?”

 

“Pick there brain?”

 

Jim shook his head.  “Ignore my sense of humor Spock.  It’s just a human expression.”

 

The turbo lift stopped and they both stepped out of it.  Striding down the hallway, they were soon intercepted by the Doctor.  McCoy looked especially displeased, but then again Jim knew why.  As soon as they entered the transporter room, McCoy turned and glared at Jim.

 

“Of all the tom foolery why do I have to be vaporized into bits and beamed down there Jim?” McCoy gestured wildly. ”You don’t need me on this peaceful mission.”

 

“Why Bones of course I need you.”  Jim said with a Cheshire smile.  He could see the suspicion in McCoy’s eyes, but knew he would take the bait.

 

“And why do you need me Jim?” McCoy asked hesitantly.

 

“Why to keep Mister Spock from being bored is all.”  Jim chuckled at McCoy’s expression and he could almost feel Spock glaring at him.  Walking over to the Transporter, he waited until his two officers were on it and nodded at the Ensign.

 

“Energize.”

 

--

 

Spock looked around in curiosity as they appeared on the planet.  They stood before a giant brown building that had a strange green plants crawling up its stone walls.  The ground beneath there feet was paved with stones and he could hear excited chatter nearby. Footsteps approached and he watched as Ambassador Perloian appeared with with a few guards.

 

Bowing at the waist Perloian smiled.  “I am glad to finally meet the famous Captain Kirk face to face.”

 

“It is a pleasure to meet you as well Ambassador.”  Jim gestured to his two officers. ”This is Commander Spock my First Officer and Doctor Leonard McCoy my Chief Medical Officer.”

 

The Ambassador greeted them both pleasantly.  “If you will follow me I will show you to your accommodations.  I hope you will enjoy your stay here.”

 

The guards surrounded them as they walked out of the courtyard and onto a public street.   Different kinds of Sersian’s were going about there daily lives and a few stared at them as they passed. 

 

Spock looked around and studied the architecture.  He was very interested in getting a chance to examine there culture and the Sersians medical labs.  A soft chuckle caught his attention and he looked at his Captain.

 

“What is so humorous Captain?”

 

A snort left McCoy. “Why you are Mister Spock.  You look like a kid in a candy store.”

 

“It is our first time ever being on this planet Doctor.  So it is only logical to be curious about them.”

 

McCoy gaped in astonishment at Spock for understanding his comment and Jim laughed out loud.  The Ambassador glanced at them in puzzlement, before turning back around.  In a few minutes they had arrived at another stone building that had giant windows, dark red stones, and a green door. 

 

Gesturing towards the building the Ambassador smiled.  “This will be your dwelling to stay at during the negations Captain.  I hope you and your officers will find it a pleasant dwelling.  I will return shortly after you have settled in.”

 

The Ambassador turned and left.  Two guards stationed themselves outside the building and the three of them went inside.  The house was not overly large, but appeared homely. Large plants were shoved into every nook and cranny.  The living room had comfy looking cushions and the kitchen was tiny.  A problem arose when they discovered it only had two bedrooms.  Both rooms had two big beds in it, but no singles.

 

McCoy raised a finger and glared at them.  “Alright I get my own room.” He shook his head when Jim was about to speak.  “This was your idea to invite me, so I get to have my own room, no buts Jim.”

 

Spock raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.  It would be most odd to share a room with the Captain, since had never shared one with anyone before.  Even during his academy days he had always had his own room, but perhaps it was because of his father’s position. An awkward thought popped in Spock’s head and he frowned.  There was only one bed, so logically they would have to share it.  It was not an unpleasant thought to share a bed with Jim, but it left him feeling most strange.  He would need to remember to tighten his shields to keep anything from leaking through the bond while he slept.  The Captain didn’t need to know that bonded pairs could eventually read each others thoughts or emotions if not shielded. For now, he didn’t wish to tell the Captain about this part of the bond, unless it was absolutely necessary.

 

“Fine Bones, I will share a room with Mister Spock if he has no objections?” 

 

“No Captain it is reasonable.  It is logically for us to share, since there are only two beds in this home.”

 

“Logical my foot.” McCoy grumbled as he left the room.

 

Spock watched as the Captain set his phaser and communicator down on one of the end tables, before he sat down on one of the couches.  Sitting down himself, Spock looked at the plant next to him.  It was a fuzzy plant with strange pink flowers on it.  He wondered what it was called.

 

“Are you sure it won’t bother you Spock?”  Jim asked curiously.  He watched as Spock stared at the plant next to him for a bit.  It was going to be weird sharing a room with Spock, since he had never done it before.  He seriously hoped those passionate dreams didn’t haunt him while sleeping next to Spock.  It could make an already awkward arrangement even worse if the telepathic Vulcan picked up any of his stray thoughts.

 

“I am fine with the situation Captain, unless it bothers you?”

 

Waving a hand frantically, Jim let out a fake laugh.  By the look on Spock’s face, he knew that the Vulcan could tell something was wrong.  With a cough, he broke off his laugh, and tried to smile.

 

“As long as you are fine with it then so am I.”

 

Spock was staring at him for so long that Jim began to grow nervous.  A knock at the door saved him, and he almost let out a relieved sigh as he jumped to his feet. He could feel Spock watching him, but he ignored it.  Striding to the door, he quickly pulled it open, and he was never so happy to see the Ambassador as he was at that moment.

 

“We are ready to meet with you Captain.  If you would all follow me.”

 

Jim called for McCoy and they followed the Ambassador out the door. They were soon joined by the guards and began walking down the street.  Jim could feel Spock looking at him still, but he didn’t know what to say. How do you tell someone you would soon be sharing a bed with, that you were having passionate dreams about him?  If it disturbed him then how would it affect Spock?  Talk about a bad situation.  Pushing these troublesome thoughts aside, he took a deep breath.  He needed to be clear headed if he was going to be dealing with the Sersian.  Not thinking about Spock, the sleeping arrangements, or even there bond.  Looking down at the paved ground, he had a feeling this was going to be a long day.

 

--

 

Meeting the Sersian leader Thonirion, was an eye opening experience, or so Jim believed.  The Sersian leader was tall, even among his people, with reddish scales, and yellow eyes.  His horns stood straight up through his short black mane and he was wearing a white robe. The thing Jim liked most about Thonirion was his red eyes, which appeared honest and wise.  Of course it helped that Thonirion talked about interesting things and barely touched on the Federation treaty.  It was a nice change from the normally boring diplomatic talks and Jim was quiet entertained.

 

“So Captain is true that humans eat meat?” Thonirion asked curiously.  He gestured at the table which was loaded with mostly vegetarian dishes. “We Sersian are mostly non-meat eaters although there are few of our kind who still love the flesh.”

 

Jim smiled as he sipped his drink. “Some of my kinds do like to eat meat.” Both of them looked at McCoy who was gesturing wildly with a drumstick to his Sersian companion.  “But there are some who are non-meat eaters as well.  I guess it depends on you preference.”

 

“Ah I see.”  Thonirion looked over at the Vulcan.  Spock was standing next to a group of Serisian medics and talking to them quiet animatedly.  “And your First Officer?”

 

“Definitely a non-meat eater.” Jim smiled at Spock’s gestures.  They weren’t as over the top as McCoy’s, but he could tell the Vulcan was excited.  It wasn’t often that he saw his First Officer display any emotions.  It made him smile, before looking back at his companion.  “Vulcan are vegetarians and do not like to eat meat.”

 

“Ah your people are most fascinating Captain Kirk.  This alliance between our people will be……….”

 

A sudden explosion rocked the party and bits of debris flew in the air.  Jim knocked Thonirion to the ground as a large chunk of wall missed them.  If he hadn’t seen it in time, then it was possible it would have killed the Serisian leader.  Chocking smoke rolled into the room and Jim coughed.  It was so hard to see, but when it cleared he saw armed Sersians.  They were different from the ones at the party.  There skin was a dark blue and they had pure white manes with short horns. 

 

Razor sharp teeth glimmered in the light as one of them spoke up.  “Resist us and die.”

 

An angry shout echoed in the room as the council’s guards filed into the room and all hell broke loose.  In the confusion, Jim lost sight of Thonirion, and tried to find his two officers.  It was difficult to find them, with Sersian’s running around in panic, loud screams, and random fights breaking out.  Finally spotting blue clothing, he shoved his way over to Bone’s side.

 

“Dammit it Jim, what the hell is going on?”  McCoy exclaimed.  He held a wine bottle in one hand and the drumstick in the other.  If the situation wasn’t so dire, Jim would have been laughing at the sight.

 

“I don’t know Bones.” Jim grabbed the Doctor and ducked as a Sersian sailed over there heads.  “It appears that some of the Sersian’s are not too happy for some reason.  Perhaps a civil war?”

 

“Well doesn’t that beat all.”  Raising his heavy bottle, McCoy whacked a blue Sersian, and watched it collapse to the floor.  “Why is it every mission we go on something goes wrong?  It’s like we are cursed.”

 

Now Jim knew why he had a bottle in hand.  It was practical since neither of them had any weapons and there phasers were back at there current abode.  Jim slugged a blue Sersian in the snout, and slammed his foot into its knee. It went down with a howl of pain.  “I don’t know Bones maybe we are lucky?”

 

McCoy was about to make a smart remark, but he gasped instead.  Turning around, Jim felt his eyes widened in horror, before he darted away from the Doctor.  Spock was locked in combat with one of the blue Sersian, while another was sneaking up behind him.  The Sersian was bigger then Thonirion and had twice the muscle mass.  Jim knew that Spock hadn’t spotted him yet, and there was no time to yell, or even to think.

 

“Jim wait!”  McCoy hollered but he didn’t listen.

 

Rushing through the crowd, he leaped over a table, and slid behind Spock.  He raised his arms just in time to block the blow and then impact.  There was a crunch of bone and Jim cried out in agony.  His left arm was broken from the hit and his right was bruised.  An angry hand curled around his neck and he was lifted off his feet.  Stars danced before his eyes as he weakly grasped at the arm.  It was getting harder to breath and he was chocking to death.  The last thing he heard before fainting was angry words in Vulcan and his name.

 

“Jim!”

 

--

 

Chapter 5: Conflict

 

Claws inched closer to his face as Spock used all his strength to keep the Sersian at bay.  The brute was twice his size and almost as strong as any Vulcan.  He could smell the creature’s fetid breath and disgust shown in his dark brown eyes.  A shout caught Spock’s attention and a sudden flaring of the bond made him falter.  He could feel the Captain behind him and a few emotions leaked through his shields.  The Captain was radiating panic, fear, but most of all courage.  Spock wondered why his Captain was behind him, until sudden pain almost tore down his shields.  He heard the crack of bone and the Captain’s sudden cry was chocked off.   Agony rippled through the bond and he could feel the human dying by degrees.

 

A green mist began to obscure everything and everyone around him.  Spock barely noticed when the Sersian he battled was overpowering him.  He didn’t notice, when a razor sharp claw scratched his face, or the toothy grin that appeared on reptilian features.  All he felt was intense anger that someone had dared to damage his bond mate.  The careful Vulcan logic that he had cultivated for years suddenly shattered in an instance and all his emotions roared to the surface. With a sudden savage twist, the Sersian howled in agony as his arms were ripped out of its sockets.  Dark brown eyes blazed in ferocity as Spock grabbed the creatures by the neck and with Vulcan strength flung it away from him.  Whirling around on his heels, Spock let out an enraged cry, and sunk his nails into the Sersian wrist that held Jim. Pulling the arm down, he heard bone crack, and watched as it broke through blue flesh.  The Sersian howled in agony and his arm dripped blackish blood onto the floor. 

 

Spock caught Jim as he fell and pulled him closer to his body.  He could feel the Captain gasping for breath and he glared at the Sersian.  Holding the Captain tightly against his side, Spock raised his foot, and with all the force he could muster, slammed it into the Sersian’s chest.  The creature cried out as bones broke and he sailed into the air. Spock ignored the pained cries as the Sersian fell into a fleeing crowd of people nearby.  All he cared about was his bond mate’s pain and the urge to protect him.  Spock cradled the Captain in his arms and gently touched his face.  He could feel the spark that was Jim flickering in his mind and not even thinking descended into a meld with the human.  Gently he circled the flickering form and surrounded it with his own.  He gently fed it with his own strength and watched as it glowed brighter.  There two selves intertwined and Spock let out a gasp.  It was like finding something he had been searching for all his life and yet so afraid to take it.  A sudden presence outside the meld made Spock growl and gently as he could he extracted himself from Jim.  A weapon was pressed against the back of his head and he froze.

 

“Don’t move,” a gravelly voiced said from behind Spock, “if you do your friend over there will suffer the consequences.”

 

A Sersian had an arm around McCoy’s neck and a phaser against his head.  The Doctor looked at Spock in apology as he was dragged closer to them.  Spock weighed the odds against them and found the chances of escaping very low.  With the phasers pointed at the both of them, and the Captain unconscious, there was no chance of escape.  The phaser was nudged against Spock’s skull again and he tensed. 

 

“Get up Vulcan and move away from the human.”

 

Spock tightened his arms around the Captain, but knew had to let him go.  To resist could prove fatal or worse.  The Vulcan raised his head and looked at the Doctor.  Blues eyes met dark brown and a plan passed between them.  Laying the Captain on the ground, Spock gently smoothed the Jim’s golden hair back from his forehead, and gave a slight nod. 

 

McCoy had been waiting until the creature relaxed a fraction and the cue from Spock.  The phaser was not against his skull anymore and he said a prayer.  Slamming his skull back, he felt it connect with the Sersian head with a loud crack.  A sudden shout almost deafened him, but he ignored it.  With a sharp elbow to the Sersian’s chest, he broke free and dropped to the ground.  He heard another cry and felt something whoosh over his head.  Scrambling on all fours, he turned around and smiled.  The Sersians were sprawled on top of each other and unconscious.

 

“That Doctor was a dangerous gamble.”

 

A laugh escaped McCoy.  “It wasn’t like we had much of a choice Spock.”  The Doctor shrugged.  “It was either risk it all or be captured by the goon squad.”

 

“Indeed.”

 

McCoy quickly bent over Jim and carefully examined him.  A grimace crossed his face. Sighing he looked at Spock.  “The good news is that his wounds aren’t fatal.”

 

“And the bad news?”

 

“One of his arms is broken and the other is badly bruised.  I am a little worried about his neck since he is having a hard time trying to breath.”

 

The fighting was growing more intense around them as the Sersian guards were gaining the upper hand against the invaders.  It wasn’t a good place for them to be and both officers knew it. 

 

“Is it alright to move the Captain?”

 

McCoy smiled grimly.  “No but we have no choice. “

 

Jim was lifted with care as the two officers worked as a team.  McCoy took the lead trying to find them a safe route out while Spock carried the Captain.  Luck seemed to be on there side when Ambassador Perloian suddenly appeared. 

 

“This way Doctor McCoy, Commander Spock.” Perloian shouted excitedly.

 

Quickly they followed him through the chaos and down several hallways.  They were finally led into a room were many Sersian council members were taking refugee.  Armed guards patrolled the area and for now they were safe.  Perloian led the way to were the Serisian leader Thonirion was sitting.  Thonirion looked a bit bruised, had torn clothing, but appeared alright. 

 

The Captain was gently laid on the ground and McCoy set to work.  He wasn’t happy with what the medical Tricorder showed him or the way the Captain was breathing.  Using a hypo on Jim, McCoy looked up at Spock.

 

“We need to get him back to the Enterprise Spock.  I can’t treat these injuries down here.”

 

Spock inclined his head.  “Then we must return to our establishment.  The communicators are there.”

 

 “I will send some of the guards with you.”  Thonirion looked down in sorrow at the Captain.  “Hopefully when the situation down here isn’t most dire we will be able to talk again.”

 

--

 

Pain. Jim let out a moan as his old friend pain rose up to greet him.  Sometimes he wondered if pain liked to follow him around like a puppy.  He must have been in one hell of a fight with something big.  It was always the big guys who threw the hardest hits, which of course left him feeling like hell.  A hiss of a hypospray had him opening tired eyes and staring directly into blazing blue.  Bones looked extremely pissed off so he must have done something that had not pleased the Doctor.  If looks could kill he would be a dead man.

 

Licking dry lips he tried to speak.  “How bad is it?”

 

“Bad enough for me to become an alcoholic.”  McCoy wrote down some readings on a PADD and pushed a few buttons on the machine overhead.  “Did you have to take on someone bigger then you Jim or is it a macho complex?”

 

Jim tried to laugh, but coughed harshly instead.  His throat was so dry and in agony.  Just what the hell had happened?

 

“I wouldn’t try to talk or laugh if I were you.”  McCoy glared down at Jim.  The Captain squirmed at the heated look.  “Your throat was almost crushed, which caused some swelling.  And your arm was fractured with pieces of bone floating everywhere and that was not a fun time to clean up.”

 

Jim tried to look apologetic, but failed.  “I am sorry Bones.  Now could you please tell me what the hell happened?  I can’t really remember since my mind is a bit fuzzy.”

 

McCoy grinned evilly.  “That would be the hypospray I gave you before you woke up.  Can’t have you trying to get out of Sickbay before I say so.”

 

An angry retort was cut off by a sleepy yawn.  Jim tried to stay away, but was soon unconscious.  A gleeful grin crossed McCoy’s face and he could here Nurse Chapel chuckling nearby.

 

“That was most devious Doctor.”

 

“Well it’s the only way to keep our foolish Captain in bed Spock.”  McCoy wrote down a few more things on the PADD before handing it to Nurse Chapel.  He turned and looked at Spock.  “It was either drug him or watch him try to overdo things when he is injured. How is the situation on Sersie?”

 

Spock clasped his hands behind his back.  “It appears that the Sersian council has gained the upper hand and subdued the attackers.  Although they are not forthcoming on why this incident occurred.”

 

“Secretive bastards.”

 

“I have to concur.” Spock walked over to the Captain.  The human was sleeping and appeared to be in no pain. “Starfleet is sending the U.S.S Epsilon with an Ambassador on board to take over this situation.”

 

“What? Then why send us?”

 

“Perhaps at the time the situation was peaceful, but now it has gotten out of hand, and they fear that the treaty will not happen.”  Spock gave a slight shrug.  “We have been given permission for shore leave.”

 

McCoy threw his hands up.  “First they say no then they say yes.  It’s enough to drive a man crazy.”

 

Spock watched as McCoy stalked away to his office in annoyance.  A slight smile appeared on the Vulcan’s face.  He regarded the Captain for a moment, and gently brushed back the golden hair that curled on the human’s forehead. His finger tips brushed against the Captain skin and Spock felt a small spark.  Jerking his hand back sharply, he took a deep breath.  The bond was calling to him, but he ignored it.  Striding out of sickbay it was time to set a course for New Vulcan.  The crew would get a chance for shore leave and there the bond could be broken.  He couldn’t help but be perplexed as to why he had touched the Captain again without any justification.  It was as if he needed to reassure himself that the Captain was alright by touching him.  His human side was delighted by the touch, but his Vulcan side was confused.  After his duties were over, he would go to his quarters and mediate on these emotions.  It was logical to rid himself of these feelings if possible, but doubt remained if he would succeed. 

 

--

 

Chapter 6:  Sharing

 

The sun shone brilliantly in the sky and baked the red earth below.  Warmth radiated on his skin and Jim let out a yawn.   He had been lazing in the sun for over an hour on some soft silky cushions and it felt quiet good.  

 

The Enterprise had arrived at New Vulcan only 2 days ago after being granted shore leave.  He hadn’t been too happy at Bones for knocking him out with the hypospray, but it wasn’t unusual.  Spock had debriefed him on the situation with the Sersian and there replacements.  He didn’t feel too bad leaving the Sersian’s with the U.S.S. Epsilon although he would miss his talks with there leader.  It was nice to finally get a chance to relax and he smiled.

 

New Vulcan or Vulcan II was quiet an interesting planet.  It was just as arid and dry as Vulcan had been well with some exceptions. The majority of the planet was covered in desert, but a few spots had lush green forest, and large bodies of water.  Undocumented creatures roamed the planet, new medical plants had been discovered, and there were many scenic sites.  The population on Vulcan II was only around ten thousand since the destruction of there home world.   Luckily most of the people had escaped from Vulcan or had been off planet although many considered them an endangered race.  The city that Jim was residing in was called Shi'Kahr, named in memory of the former capital, and was against the edge of one the forests, which explained why the garden here was so green.   
 

Another yawn escaped him and he stretched.   The garden he resided in was teaming with plant life and strangely enough roses.  The flowers had surprised him when he first saw them and he wondered about it.   Spock had invited both him and McCoy to stay at his father Sarek’s home during there shore leave.  Bones had declined saying he wanted to check out the Medical Institute and they had lodging for visitors.  Of course before Bones had left them, he had warned Jim that he was to rest, and no strenuous actives.  Spock had made sure that Jim had followed the Doctors orders.  Not that he could complain since he was exhausted.  Between the dreams, the missions, and his latest injury he need this little vacation.   

 

 A sudden breeze made the smell of roses more potent and he turned his head.  The roses bobbed in the wind and the petals looked velvety to the touch. A flash of white caught his eyes and he slowly sat up.  It appeared to be a butterfly, with its long white wings that were almost translucent, and it had long black antennae.  A chocolate colored butterfly was trailing after it and he watched as they appeared to dance in the gentle breeze.  He hadn’t seen one since he had last been to Iowa visiting his mother.  Stretching out a hand, he patiently waited until it landed on his finger tips, and smiled.  He had always loved watching them back on the farm when he had been out in the woods with his brother Sam.  They were hardy little creatures who didn’t live long, but they were one of the beauties of nature.

 

Spock walked outside of the house and through the gardens.  It was almost lunch time and he wanted to ask the Captain if he would like to eat.  A flash of white caught his attention and he slowed to a stop.  Two butterflies were near his Captain and a white one calmly rested on his fingers.  A small smile appeared on Spock’s lips as he watched this innocent scene.  There had never been any butterflies on Vulcan and he had only seen a few on the Earth.  He wondered if it was the Danaus gilippus or the Queen Butterfly.  There had been rumors that they were being breed to genetically to survive on Vulcan II.  Butterflies were beneficial to the environment and helped to pollinate flowers. 

 

Spock watched as the butterfly opened its wings more fully. The Captain let out a gentle laugh and his hazel eyes sparkled.  Spock felt his pulse quicken a little and something else caught his attention.  The Captain’s hazel eyes had changed color and he blinked. They had been a golden brown a moment before and now they were a brilliant green with flecks of gold.  He had never noticed that the Captain’s eye color would change with his mood and it was fascinating to him.  It made him curious if other humans eye colors changed with there moods and what caused it.  Was it there emotions or a trick of the light?  Vulcan eye color usually consisted of brown, dark brown, or black.    There eyes never changed color so it was not as interesting to look at. 

 

“Mister Spock I am quiet shocked to see you smiling since this is the first time I have ever seen it,” Jim said in amusement.

 

The smile quickly slipped off his face and Spock could feel his ears burn. He wondered just how long had the Captain had been staring at him?  Spock walked closer to the Captain and stopped.  “I was not smiling Captain.  It was merely a muscle spasm.”

 

A skeptical look was shot his way.  “I’ll believe that when pigs fly Mister Spock.”

 

“Pigs fly?”

 

“Never mind.” Jim smiled at the perplexed look sent his way.  Turning his attention to the butterfly, he brought his hand closer and gently blew at it.  With a soft flap of its wings it took off and flew into the air.  The two of them watched as the white butterfly rejoined the chocolate one and flew away.  Turning back to his First Officer, he looked at him expectantly.  “Was there something you wanted Mister Spock?”

 

“Yes Captain, I came to ask if you are ready for lunch.”

 

“My name is Jim”

 

A confused look came over Spock’s face.  “Sir?”

 

Jim let out a delighted laugh and he grabbed Spock’s hand.  A jolt went through him and he looked at Spock in surprise.  The Vulcan snatched his hand away and hid it behind his back.  There was an awkward silence as the two of them stared at each other.  Feeling a bit tense from the jolt, Jim took a deep breath and forced himself to relax.

 

“I am sorry Spock I forgot Vulcan’s do not like to be touched.”  Placing a hand over his heart, Jim gave an exaggerated bow.   Straightening he grinned.  “Call me Jim, Spock.  We are on shore leave and I am staying with you.  It would be odd to hear you calling me Captain all the time.”

 

Spock gazed at the Captain with an unreadable expression before nodding.  “Very well Jim.”

 

“Good now lets eat, I am starved!”

 

Spock watched as Jim walked ahead of him and began to chatter about his day in the garden.  He couldn’t help but glance at the human’s hand and then his own.  The bond was growing stronger and he wasn’t to sure what to think of it.  He had barely any experiences in bonds or relationships.  Asking his father about bonds was a possible solution, but it was not easy to talk to him.  Without his mother’s presence, the two of them had a harder time connecting, and barely spoke to each other unless absolutely necessary.  The only bonding experience he could relate to was the one he had with T’Pring, but that had been more of an annoyance.  He had felt no emotion when he had learned she had died during Vulcan’s destruction. The bond between them had been a cold and lifeless.  With Jim he was realizing there was something warm and……..

 

“Are you coming Spock?” Jim had turned around and looked at him expectantly. 

 

Realizing he hadn’t moved at all, Spock strode towards Jim and pushed these thoughts aside.  He would think of this during his mediation when there were no distractions.  Catching up to the Captain the two of them entered the house and went into the kitchen. 

It was a decent size kitchen, with good counter space, and the latest replicator equipment.  An island counter decorated with white and gold clothes sat in the middle of the kitchen with comfortable chairs surrounding it. A few plants sat on the window seal and a cheery red curtain covered the window.  It was a homey setting and some how so un-Vulcan like. 

 

Jim slid onto a stool and watched as Spock prepared them lunch.  He was hoping that he wouldn’t be making him eat any Plomeek soup.  It had never smelled appetizing to him before and he doubted it would now.  The soup was orange in color and had vegetables floating in it.  Spock seemed to enjoy eating the soup, but no way was Jim going to touch it.   There was much doubt there would be any meat during there meal, since Vulcans were vegetarians.  He could almost hear Bones evil chuckle and of course the whole speech about him needing to loose a few pounds.    

 

“Do you cook often when visiting home Spock?” Jim asked curiously.  He watched as Spock’s shoulder’s tensed a bit and he wondered if he had said something wrong.

 

“No not often.”  Spock turned around and placed a bowl full of vegetables on the counter.  They looked crisp and delicious. “My mother would usually do the cooking and I would help her.”

 

Jim winced at the melancholy in Spock’s tone. Talk about foot in mouth even if he hadn’t meant too.  Spock’s mother was a sore subject at the best of times and taboo at the worst.  His First Officer would go all quiet and stiff if anyone even mentioned his mother’s name in his presence.  He had observed this once when accidentally overhearing Uhura trying to talk to Spock about it.  It had been understandable that she had wanted to console him since they had been dating at the time.  That talk had made Spock hard to approach and his cold shoulder treatment had lasted for days.  One poor ensign had learned that the hard way when Spock had spoken to her so coldly that most of the bridge crew had cringed in terror.  She had transferred later.  Ever since then know one brought up Spock’s mother’s name.  It seemed changing the subject was needed and quickly.  Making sure Spock was looking his way, Jim flinched a delicious look purple veggie and popped it into his mouth.  The resounding crunch echoed in the kitchen and Spock raised an eye brow at him.   He wasn’t to sure what the eyebrow meant at the moment, but he could see the amusement flash in Spock’s eyes.

 

More food was placed on the table and Jim looked at it curiously.  He didn’t recognize most of the dishes, but it looked good.  A pasta dish with creamy red sauce topped with tomatoes and other vegetables caught his attention.  It looked delicious but not something he would have thought his First Officer would have eaten.  In fact he was fairly surprised to see a Terran dish on the table, although he shouldn’t be since Spock’s mother was human.   Spock finally brought the last dish over and sat down across from him. 

 

Jim ate a few bites of the pasta and it was good. He closed his eyes to better savor the flavors.

 

“My mother would do the same thing when she would eat pasta.”  Spock said quietly.  “She said it reminded her of home.”

 

Surprise showed on Jim’s face.  He was shocked that Spock was mentioning his mother without anyone asking.  Chewing more pasta, he set down his fork and regarded Spock curiously. He hoped asking this would not give him the cold shoulder treatment, but he just had to ask.  “Did you eat this often when growing up?”

 

“Sometimes.”  Spock stared at the pasta on his fork and gave a small shrug.  “Mother would occasionally request that father bring some back from his visits to Earth.  My father thought it was a strange request, but he would comply.”

 

“He must have cared for you mother very much to give in to that request.”

 

A contemplative look crossed Spock’s features before he began to eat again.  More food was eaten and it was quiet again.  Wanting to know more about Spock, Jim decided to share something about his own mother.

 

 “My mother Winona loved strawberries. She loved them in everything from pies, to cakes, and even ice-cream.”  Crunching on a veggie Jim smiled fondly.  “No matter what the season she would make my father go through hell or high water to get some.” Seeing the interested look shot his way Jim smiled.  “My older brother Sam and I would call her the strawberry queen.  We would bring her strawberries and bow to her saying your majesty.  She would get a kick out of it.”  A sad look crossed Jim’s face and he sighed.  “She never ate strawberries again after my father died.”

 

Spock could see the melancholy on Jim’s face.  He didn’t like the look that changed the hazel eyes to a dark gold.  It made something inside of him twinge painful.   “I have an older brother named Sybok.”  He didn’t know what possessed him to talk about his older brother.  It was a sore subject in his family, but seeing the sadness fade from Jim made it worth it.  “He was my playmate for many years and taught me many things. One of them was how to fight in the Vulcan martial arts.”

 

“Oh what happened to him?” Jim had forgotten about his past pain and was really curious.  He had never known that Spock had a brother and thought he was an only child.

 

“He became highly illogical as he grew older.  And eventually he followed the ways of V'tosh ka'tur, a Vulcan without logic.” Spock finished eating and put down his fork. “He was later banished from Vulcan and I have not seen him in 10.5 years.”

 

“Ah I see.”  Jim regarded Spock for a time then smiled.  “Thanks for sharing some of your past with me Spock I am honored.”

 

“You are welcome.”

 

Jim finished eating and gathered up the dishes.  He walked over to the Recycler and began to load it up  As Jim began to clearing away the remaining dishes since it was only fair since Spock had cooked, he couldn’t but think on there conversation.  It surprised him that Spock had shared something so personal with him especially in regarded to his outcast brother or even his mother.  Usually trying to get Spock to share anything about himself was as hard as getting Scotty to take shore leave from engineering.  Near impossible without a lot of threats and pulling rank.  He couldn’t help but feel happy over finding out more about Spock and Jim began to whistle cheerily.  So far this shore leave was turning out to be a nice vacation and he wondered what else he would learn about his First Officer.  

 

A quiet sigh caught his attention and Jim turned around.  Spock’s face was expressionless, but he appeared upset judging by his grip on the paper he held in his hand.  Why was he so upset? Jim wondered when had Spock gotten the paper and what was on it.  It looked to be expensive creamy paper and had to be from someone important. Maybe someone had come over, but he hadn’t heard the buzz of the door?

 

Dumping the last of the dishes in the recycler, he walked over to Spock.   “What is it?”

 

“We have been summoned to the high temple Mount Hashun tomorrow morning.” Spock handed the paper to Jim. “It appears that the healer T’Fon has accepted our request.”

 

--

 

Chapter 7: Meeting of Minds

 

“Why are there so many damn steps? It feels like I have been on these steps for half my lifetime!”

 

“There are only fifty-two steps Captain and it’s only been ten minutes.”

 

“I don’t care how many steps there are Spock and didn’t I tell you to call me Jim?” 

 

“I will try to remember to do so Captain.”

 

Jim held back a few choice words at that comment, stubborn Vulcan’s, and these damn steps.  He couldn’t help but brace his hands on his knees and pant in the agonizing heat.  It was so hot that he felt like he was cooking slowly from the inside out.  The Vulcan healer T’Fon had summoned them to come to the Vulcan high temple Mount Hashun at noon today, which was of course the hottest time to be outside.  Not that it seemed to affect Spock any, but for a human it was sweltering.  Of course the temple was far from the city, up impossible stairs, and on a mountain to boot.  It hadn’t been so bad coming out here at first, but then again they had been in an air-car, and unfortunately they had to abandon it far below.  The worst part was when he had decided to wear dark blue shirt and black pants which was causing him to overheat. He had forgotten that the sun’s rays loved dark clothes.  Jim couldn’t help but glare at Spock, who was wearing all black and looked as cool as a cucumber.  Talk about the unfairness of it all. 

 

“Are you coming Jim?”

 

Jim huffed.  “Yes I am coming Spock.”

 

It took several more minutes, but finally they reached the top of the staircase.  Resting for a moment, Jim took in the architecture of the building, and thought it was interesting.  The temple itself blended in with the mountain with its reddish pillars and strange humanoid statues.  Vegetation wrapped around each pillar with strange white flowers encircling it.  He wondered who the statues were, perhaps deities, or maybe they represented someone important from the past?  Vulcan maidens dressed in long flowing white robes wandered around the temple with there black hair was tied up with colorful hair pieces.  There clothes were transparent and he tried not to ogle.  A few guards stood nearby dressed in blood red armor with wicked looking spears.  A maiden came towards them and stopped in front of Spock.  She offered the traditional greeting.

 

“If you will follow me I will lead you to Lady T’Fon.”

 

Spock returned the greeting.  Soon they stepped into darkness and a relieved sigh escaped Jim.  It was much cooler then being outside although it was hard to adjust to the dimness.  Blinking rapidly, Jim noticed they were in a long dim hallway, with jagged rock walls, and the floor was covered in sand. Torches were embedded in the walls and offered some illuminations. They soon came to a black door inscribed with ancient Vulcan scripts and the maiden paused before it.  She clasped her hands together as if in prayer and then pushed it open.  The sunlight was bright compared to the dim hallway and it took a few moments for there eyes to adjust.  Jim looked around curiously and was surprised.  Tall leafy trees grew all around the cliff they stood upon and butterflies fluttered around exotic flowers.  A pile of pillows rested under one of the trees and a Vulcan woman stood beside them.  She was an older Vulcan with grey streaked hair and piercing black eyes.  A long black robe encased her slim form, gold bangles encircled her wrist, and an elaborate gold hair piece held her hair back.

 

The lady held her hand up in the Vulcan customary greeting.  “Greetings Spock and to you as well Captain Kirk.  I am known as T’Fon and I will assistant you in the dissolvement of thy bond.  Please sit so I may aid thee in this endeavor.”

 

Jim looked at Spock for a moment, before sitting on her right and Spock on her left.  She kneeled before them and placed her fingertips on both of there faces.  The maiden began to wander around the room lighting candles and a few incense.  The strong smell was overpowering and relaxing.  Jim felt himself nodding a bit and jerked his head up.  He felt suddenly like his mind was turning to mush.

 

T’Fon looked at him.  “Do not fear, this is to help both you and Spock relax.  Now breathe slowly and let the melding commence.”

 

A few more words were said in Vulcan but Jim could no longer hear them.  The darkness beckoned and soon there was nothing.

 

~

 

Spock opened his eyes slowly as his mind tried to focus.  Everything around him swayed and it was hard to see.  He patiently waited until he could focus properly.  Color whirled around him and flowed in spiraling patterns. A flash of gold caught his attention.   The gold swirled around intertwining with the blues, greens, and black patches of his mind. There were more splashes of vivid color in the distance.  It was like looking at a kaleidoscope of color or a rainbow forming after a spring shower on Earth.

 

A red rope lay nearby that seemed to glow brighter the longer he stared at it. Spock knew what this rope represented.  He reached over and gently grasped it.  Warmth radiated throughout his being.  Jim. Standing up, he followed the red rope that was his bond to his Captain.  He could feel many things through there bond.  Astonishment, happiness, and a small dose of awe.  Eventually he found T’Fon and Jim. There forms were solid and there katra’s glowed around them faintly.  T’Fon glowed a calming green, while Jim glowed a brilliant gold.  He looked down at himself and was not surprised that he was glowing a dark blue with black splashes here and there. The two of them were standing on a cliff edge near something that glowed brilliantly.  A few more steps and he stood beside Jim.  Spock let out a small gasp of wonder. A small glowing bird flapped before them with red and goldish flames encircling its body.  Green eyes gazed at them serenely.  What was even more astonishing was he could see that the red rope he held, connected to the bird, and the other connected to Jim.

 

“This is the form your bond has taken Spock.” T’Fon gestured at the bird.  “It is small now because your bond is still so new.”

 

“A phoenix…..” Jim whispered softly. 

 

T’Fon nodded at Jim.  “Yes.  It is rare for a bond to take the form of a creature especially a mythical Terran one.”

 

Spock carefully reached out to touch the bird.  It seemed to glow brighter when his fingers stroked its flaming head.  He could feel contentment from it.  Fascinating.

 

“It seems like a terrible thing to destroy it.”  Jim said quietly as he gently touched its feathery head.

 

Spock looked at him in surprise.  He was about to speak when he saw T’Fon began to move.

 

T’Fon carefully circled behind it.  She raised both her hands and her bangles jangled a clear note.  Her form began to glow and she looked at both of them. “I will attempt to disconnect the bond from you both.”  She paused for a minute for her words to sink in.  “Know that there will be discomfort and perhaps some pain.”

 

Spock nodded slowly and noticed his Captain did the same. Through the bond he could feel regret and sadness.  Doubt suddenly assailed him.  Was this the right thing to do he couldn’t help but wonder. The few touches he had shared with Jim had intrigued him.  Something was growing between them and it wasn’t just friendship.  If he dissolved the bond would it end what had only just started? Pushing the emotions aside, he reinstated his logic.  It was the right thing to do.  This was an unwanted bond that had been forced on them and had to be dissolved quickly, but still the doubt lingered. 

 

T’Fon began to chant in the old Vulcan language and her voice echoed.  Her piercing eyes closed and then she was silent.  At first it was quiet for a time, but suddenly there was a loud shriek.  Agony flared white hot through the bond.  It felt like something was trying to rip his soul from his body and he fell to his knees.  Spock panted in pain and there was a sudden thud next to him.  Jim was writhing on the ground and screaming incoherently.  Before his eyes, he watched as the red rope that was there bond seemed to twist and morph between them.  Rips were appearing on the bond rope and blood seemed to seep from it.  The pain became all consuming.  Spock fell to the ground and curled in a fetal position.  It was too much.  The screams from his bond mate, the agony of his soul ripping, and then mercifully everything went black.

 

~

 

A cool hand touched his brow and it was soothing.  Gentle fingers traced across his eye brow, down his cheek, and across his lips.  Consciousness was returning slowly and Spock opened his eyes.  Warm hazel looked down at him in concern.  Spock couldn’t help but reach up and gently cup Jim’s cheek.  The human’s cheek was smooth and cool.  He watched as Jim turned his head and kissed his hand.  A spark flared between them.  For a moment, Spock forgot to breathe as he gazed into shocked eyes that seemed to shift to gold.

 

“You have awakened Spock?” 

 

The voice of T’Fon made Spock jerk away from Jim in surprise.  Realizing the position he was in, Spock sat up and looked away from Jim.  His ears burned in embarrassment and he could feel it spread to his cheeks. 

 

Jim was also feeling embarrassed.  He didn’t know what had possessed him to touch Spock in such an intimate manor or kiss his hand.  When he had first awoken from the meld, he had been distressed to find the Vulcan unconscious, and not moving.  Rushing over to Spock’s side, Jim had taken the Vulcan into his arms, and had held him.  Gazing down at the Vulcan, he couldn’t help but touch his face to reassure himself that Spock was alright.  It wasn’t until the dark brown eyes had opened that he had felt intense relief overwhelm him.  When Spock had touched his cheek it had seemed natural to kiss his hand.  Of course embarrassment had set in when T’Fon had spoken and he had forgotten she was in the room.  He couldn’t help but wonder if he was starting to feel attraction for Spock.  Theses thoughts scared him a bit and he was unsure what to think.

 

T’Fon walked over to a gong and hit it once.  When she had both of there attentions she spoke, “I am unable to break the bond between you.  To do so would kill one or both of you.”

 

Jim was stunned by this well a little.  Judging by how much it had hurt when she had tried to destroy there bond he wasn’t to surprised.  It had felt like something was trying to rip his soul to shreds.

 

“Is there no other way to break this bond?” Spock had stood up and clasped his hands behind his back.  “Perhaps distance?”

 

“No Spock.”  T’Fon regarded Spock with a piercing glare at her judgment being questioned.  “Only death will destroy this bond.”

 

Spock closed his eyes.  “So be it.”

 

“You are a bonded pair Spock.  You must explain all that it entails to Jim.  It is only logically he knows.” T’Fon struck the gong again

 

“All that it entails?” Jim looked at both Vulcan’s.  “What does she mean Spock?”

 

An unreadable expression crossed Spock’s face.  For a moment it didn’t look like he was going to answer Jim’s question. “It means that when I drop my shields you will be able to read all my thoughts Jim.  You will be able to feel my emotions.  We won’t be able to hide anything from each other.”

 

Jim stood up and dusted himself off.  It was a shock.  Did that mean all this time Spock could read him like an open book?  That none of his thoughts or feelings were private?  That Spock had lied to him?   “So let me get this straight.  All this time you have been able to do this and you never told me? You lied to me?”

 

“No Captain I just never explained the bond to you fully.” Spock said without a trace of emotion in his voice.

 

Jim felt his temper spring viciously to life.  Normally he could control it but not this time.    Taking one step over to Spock, he grasped the front of his robes and jerked him closer.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me this?” 

 

Spock looked at Jim for a time before glancing away.  “I don’t know.” 

 

“You don’t know?”  Jim couldn’t help but stare at him.  “How the hell wouldn’t you know Spock?  Is it something that slipped your mind suddenly or did you think I was to stupid to understand?”

 

Spock didn’t respond and gazed at him impassively.

 

Suddenly being to close to Spock was more then he could bear. He had thought that they were slowly becoming friends, but maybe that was all in his head.  Maybe all Spock saw in him was an inferior human.  Jim unclenched his fingers from Spock’s robe and spun on his heel.  If he didn’t leave now he might say something he would regret.  Striding away he ignored T’Fon when she called to him.  He yanked the door open and let it slam behind him.

 

T’Fon walked over to Spock.  “This is something you must figure out on your own Spock or else your bond will bring misery to both.” And then she was gone.

 

Spock stood there frozen for a time when suddenly he slammed his fist into a tree.  He felt the tree shudder from the impact and green leaves rained down around him.

 

~

Chapter 8: The Talk

The amber liquid burned as it slid down his throat. Slamming the glass onto the table, Jim motioned for another. He watched as the waitress in a short red skirt sidled over to him and poured him another drink. She was a voluminous blond with sparkly blue eyes, pouty full lips and curves to die for. Normally he would have already tried to charm her into his bed, but not now. Oh no. He was so furious that not even his alcoholic haze could make him forget the situation he was in. Thoughts about a certain Vulcan made him drink some more.

“Did I ever tell you keptin…..hic…..that I admire you?” Chekov looked at him with bloodshot eyes.

A snort left Sulu as he patted his friend on the back. “I think you have had enough Chekov.”

“Come on laddie you can’t be done now?” Scotty chortled. The Scotsman was barely red in the face and had a full bottle of scotch next to his glass. It was doubtful that he was even drunk after going through several bottles.

McCoy sipped his drink. “Oh I think he is done.”

They all watched as Chekov hiccupped. Jim had met some of his officers who were on shore leave while roaming the streets of Shi'Kahr. The angry gleam in his eye had McCoy grabbing him and dragging him into the nearest bar. Luckily it didn’t take long to find a dive bar near the Federation spaceport. The place appeared a little rough with dark stains on the floor, odd smells coming from the customers, and broken furniture in the corner. Luckily the place catered to all sorts so it had an ample supply of Terran liquor.

McCoy looked at the Captain over his drink. He was worried about his friend since finding him earlier. It was rare to see Jim so upset to the point that he was drinking himself into a stupor. Perhaps something had happened with Spock? He waited till Jim had taken another drink before asking. “What’s wrong Jim?

The captain froze for a moment before flashing his hundred watt smile. “Nothing is wrong Bones.”

It was such a fake smile that McCoy wasn’t buying it. He looked over at Scotty and Sulu. The two officers got the hint and dragged Chekhov off the table.

“Were going to ask for more refreshments.” Sulu waved towards the bar.

“Yes we be needin some more scotch.” Scotty said ignoring his full bottle on the table.

Chekov said nothing as he was dragged away except for hiccupping some more.

McCoy grabbed the bottle of scotch and topped off his drink. He needed the Dutch courage. Talking to Jim about his problems wasn’t always easy especially when he was in a foul mood. Taking a quick gulp, he stared at the Captain. “Ok out with it Jim. No more bullshit. And don’t try to say there is nothing wrong.”

“There is nothing wrong Bones really.” The glare he received made Jim wince. Sighing he threaded his fingers into his soft blond hair. “Alright fine. The bond isn’t broken.”

McCoy blinked. Time for some more scotch. Grasping the bottle, he poured more for himself and Jim. That was a shock. He could have sworn Jim had said that it was a sure thing. Although at the time they had been drinking heavily and he might have forgotten some of the info.

‘It’s not just that Bones.” Jim said tonelessly. He was looking down at his drink as if it could solve all his problems. “Spock lied to me. He never mentioned that through the bond he could read my thoughts and emotions whenever he wishes!”

Flabbergasted. That’s how McCoy felt at the moment. He would never have thought that the pointy eared bastard would have kept something so important from Jim. It just seemed so odd and out of character for Spock. The Vulcan was brutally blunt to a fault and never lied. Although thinking about bonds, and being able to read other peoples thoughts, gave him the hibby jibbies.

“You know what’s worse Bones?” Jim said quietly. He was swirling his amber drink around in the glass. It sloshed around before spilling on his fingers. “Is that I was starting to trust him.” A sad smiled appeared. “I thought that we were starting to become friends and then this happened.”

McCoy had never seen Jim so down before not even over a female. There had to be more to this then meets the eye. Spock had to have some kind of reason.

“Did you ask him why Jim?”

Jim slammed his drink on the table. Hazel eyes flashed dangerously. “Of course I did Bones. And you want to know what he said……I don’t know. What kind of answer is that?”

“A human one.” McCoy watched as Jim froze. He never would have thought Spock would have used such a human comment and it was very un-Vulcan like. “Perhaps he really didn’t know Jim, did you even give him a chance to explain?”

Jim leaned his cheek on his hand. Doubts assailed him. He hadn’t given Spock a chance to explain. When he had found out that Spock had not told him more about the bond, he had hit the roof. If he used his head instead of letting his anger take over, he would have realized something was wrong when Spock had said I don’t know. Letting out a moan, Jim dropped his head on the table. “No I didn’t Bones.”

“Well you have two options.” McCoy watched Jim’s head come up. “One you can hide here and get rip roaring drunk, or two you can go find Spock and talk to him.”

Jim was about to reply when a sudden angry shout stopped him.

“What the hell!”

McCoy and Jim looked towards the bar. A tall greasy looking man was glaring down at Scotty who didn’t seemed concerned. He was surrounded by several of the greasy man’s friends and they looked pissed. Judging by Chekov’s green face and Sulu’s resigned one it didn’t look good.

“Ah dammit what now?” McCoy grumbled in annoyance as he slowly stood up. He had finally gotten Jim to spill the beans and then this happened.

Jim shrugged and followed suit. “I bet Chekov threw up on the guy judging by the way he is holding his shirt.”

“Ya bet you are right. They should have deposited Chekov in the bathroom first before going to the bar.”

“Dunno about that.” Jim said as he followed McCoy. “They may never have found him again since this place is a dive joint. Come to think of it does this dump even have a bathroom?”

The greasy haired man raised a fist and shook it at Scotty. “Stop hiding the pup behind you buddy. Bruno need to teach him it’s not nice to mess up other peoples shirts.”

Scotty eyed the man up and down like he was bug he would rather squish. “It was an honest mistake and the laddie didn’t mean to do it. Can ye not let it go?”

A guffaw escaped the friends behind the greasy man. Bruno glared at the Scotsman and stabbed his finger into his chest. “Hell no I won’t, now get out my way you low life chump.”

Pointedly staring at the dirty finger on his chest Scotty sighed. “Oh now you have down it laddie.”

Sulu quickly dragged a drunken Chekov away as Scotty slammed his fist into the man’s face. A spray of blood escaped Bruno’s broken nose as he was knocked off his feet and flew into his friends. Leaving Chekov in a chair away from danger, Sulu calmly walked over to Scotty and looked down at the mess. Sulu rolled his eyes as the angry group jumped to there feet and prepared himself for a brawl. Sometimes drinking with these guys was more trouble then it was worth, although it sure kept life from being boring.

Jim and McCoy watched as the brawl began in earnest. It was an uneven fight with two against six although the two officers were holding there own. Jim glanced at the doctor and shrugged. It wasn’t like they had been looking for a fight, but nothing for it now. Plus it would help Jim relieve some frustration and escape Bone’s questions. He sure as hell didn’t want to admit that he had kissed Spock’s hand or that something else maybe growing between them besides friendship.

McCoy watched as Jim jumped into the fray with enthusiasm. Fists, bodies, and chairs went flying in the air. He could hear the bartender shrieking at them to stop, but know one paid her any mind. So much for a relaxing shore leave. Looks like he would be patching everyone up after this. Pushing back his sleeves, McCoy waded on in.

---

A breezy wind swept through the garden, stirring the roses, and causing a wind chime on the home to tinkle softly. It was quiet chilly to be outside at his time of night, but for one Vulcan he ignored the cold. Spock was kneeling on a few cushions in the middle of the garden. His eyes were closed and his breathing was slow. He had been meditating since returning from Mount Hashun. Although it had been a struggle trying to reach this state since he kept thinking about Jim. The human’s question had taken him off guard and he hadn’t known how to react. It hadn’t occurred to him to think about what would happen if the bond couldn’t be broken. How angry and betrayed Jim would feel when Spock kept this important secret from him. It was ironic to him that he could solve any scientific problem or any crisis thrown at him, but when it came to human thought or emotion he was lost. The more he thought on this, the more he lost control on his fraying emotions, until with a frustrated sigh he gave up meditating. Standing up, he began to pace back and forth. It was very un-Vulcan like thing to do, but he didn’t care.

Spock stopped pacing in front of the roses. He reached out and gently touched one. The petals were soft and a little damp. A small smile appeared on his face. His father must have watered them earlier. When his father had first arrived on Vulcan II, he had planted theses roses in remembrance of his mother. It had been a surprising human gesture, but Spock did know that his father cared deeply for her. The garden had always been something she had enjoyed and now it was a place for her family to remember her by.

“I see you still come out here to the gardens when things trouble you my son.” Sarek walked out of the shadows. “If your mother were alive she would ask you what is wrong. Since she is no longer here I will have to ask in her stead.”

“Nothing that I wish to trouble you with father.”

“It is no trouble if I have inquired about it first Spock.” Sarek countered.

Spock lifted an eyebrow. It was most unusual for his father to be interested if something was wrong with him. Sarek would normally wait patiently until the time that Spock would approach him, but then again Spock would normally go to his mother first rather then his father, unless she couldn’t help with his problems. Perhaps he should explain this situation to his father. Maybe it would help him solve it logically.

“The bond is what is troubling me father.” Spock paced a few feet away. He looked up at the night sky. The stars were brilliant tonight and the two moons that orbited the planet were slowly rising. “I am sure you have heard by now that it can’t be undone.”

“Yes T’Fon informed me earlier today.”

Spock took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He needed to be logical in front of his father. No emotion must show.

“And I also know that this might be difficult for you.”

Spock turned and looked at his father in surprise.

“It can be quiet a challenge to be bonded to another, but more so with a human.” Sarek had a contemplative look on his face. “They are quiet illogical creatures who are swayed by there emotions and yet fascinating at the same time.”

“Fascinating father?”

“Yes” Sarek tapped his chin thoughtfully. It was a habit Spock had seen his mother do often when she was thinking. He wondered if his father had picked this up from her. “Your mother was such a creature. Ruled by her passionate emotions one moment and then being logical the next. It confounded me in the beginning of our courtship, but eventually I realized something.”

Spock looked at his father in curiously.

“That even though she was an emotional Terran, and un-Vulcan like in her thinking, I wouldn’t have had her any other way.” Warmth glowed in Sarek’s eyes even though no smile touched his lips. Spock’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You must learn to trust your bond mate Spock. No matter how emotional or illogical he may become.” Sarek walked over to his son and gently touched his shoulder. “There are ample rewards when you are a bonded pair. And most importantly nothing can be hidden from each other.”

Spock thought over his father’s words as he watched him stroll away. He could still feel his lingering touch on his shoulder and the pride his father had in him. Although there conversation had been brief it had been enlightening. It was true that he hadn’t trusted Jim enough or thought him to emotional to tell him more about the bond. Perhaps he had hidden the information because maybe he had been afraid. Afraid that Jim would denounce him or hate him if he found out. Humans were known to fear the unknown, or reject what they didn’t understand, although he should have known better. When had Jim ever rejected the melds that Spock had done on him the few times in the past? When had the human cringed when Spock had mentioned he was a telepath and an empath? He could never remember his Captain ever fearing him or his powers. It seemed that he had let doubt and fear cause him to keep the secret of the bond. It was illogical for him to have thought this, but then again half of him was human. It looked like he had much to discuss with his….bond mate.

A sudden snicker nearby caught his attention. Narrowing his eyes, he could make out two human shapes headed his way. He waited patiently as Jim and McCoy staggered into the garden. He watched as the doctor jumped in surprise when he noticed him. Apparently human night vision was not up to par to a Vulcan’s.

“God damn you Spock” McCoy swore angrily. “Are you trying to put me in an early grave?”

“No Doctor.” Spock said calmly. “I will leave that up to Jim.” It was quiet satisfying to watch the dumbfounded look on the Doctor’s face. A chuckle from Jim had him looking over at his bond mate. He could smell the alcohol from were he stood and summarized they had been to a bar. Judging from the black eye the Doctor was sporting, the bloody lip Jim had, and there torn clothing it must have been a spectacular brawl.

“Did you just make a joke Spock?” Jim asked curiously. He was half-supported by the Doctor but didn’t appear drunk.

McCoy interrupted them before Spock could speak. “Come over here and take Jim from me. The blasted fool had to get into a fist fight with the biggest colossus I have ever seen.”

“Me!” Jim yelled indignantly. He jerked himself away from McCoy and hobbled a few steps towards Spock. “I didn’t start the fight it was Scotty.”

“Oh ho?” McCoy let out a sarcastic laugh. “And who jumped into the fray hm?” The Doctor pointed a finger at Jim in accusation. “As the Captain you should have stopped the fight.”

“Well you sure as hell didn’t do anything to stop it either as I recall. In fact you were right in the middle of it.”

Spock watched as the argument between the Captain and McCoy grew louder. Not wanting them to disturb his father, he walked between them. “If that is all Doctor I will assistant Jim inside. Did you need help getting back to your accommodation?”

The two humans glared at Spock before looking at each other.

Jim suddenly smiled good naturedly at McCoy. “I will see you later Bones and thanks for patching us up.”

A sigh left McCoy. “Comes with the territory. No thanks Spock I can find my own way back.”

Jim watched as McCoy disappeared into the darkness before looking at Spock. He could see the curiosity in dark brown eyes. “We got into a fight with some merchants at a bar. One thing led to another and it turned into a brawl. Luckily it got broken up before the authorities arrived.”

“I see.”

Jim ruffled his hair in aggravation before letting out a sigh. “Spock we need to talk.”

“I concur, although I would make one suggestion Jim.”

Jim looked up at Spock. “And what is that Spock?”

“Could you perhaps clean yourself?” Spock twitched his nose. “You smell.”

Surprised flashed in hazel eyes before Jim let out a hearty laugh.

--

Chapter 9: Learning

 

The cushions were quiet comfortable as Jim lounged on them.   He had been in the meditation room for over an hour while he watched Spock meditate.  The flames from the firepot in between them cast a red hue on the Vulcan’s face.   Spock’s expression was serene.  Jim glanced around in boredom.  The room was very red.  Red curtains blocked the afternoon sunlight, red cushions were scattered on the floor, a red firepot sat in the center of the room, hell even the candles were red.  Jim couldn’t help but wonder why Vulcans loved red so much?

 

There conversation from last night had been delayed to the following afternoon.  Jim had been too fatigued and sore from his brawl last night.  Top it off with the alcohol he had consumed, and the hypospray McCoy had slapped him with, had exhausted him.  Of course he hadn’t wanted to go to bed until this was settled, but Spock had been adamant.

 

A sudden intake of air had Jim looking at Spock hopefully.  He watched as dark brown eyes stared at him pensively for a few moments before the Vulcan blinked. Jim sat up and looked at Spock expectantly.  “Are you done meditating Spock?”

 

Spock inclined his dark head.  “Yes for now Jim.”

 

“Good.” Jim placed his hands on his knees. “So are you going to explain why you didn’t give me the full story on the bond now?”

 

“Yes. I didn’t trust you.” Spock said simply. He held up a hand to stop Jim from speaking.  Steepling his fingers he gazed into annoyed hazel.  “You must see it from my point of view Jim.  We entered into an unwanted bond.  Neither of us were even friends at the time.  How could I trust you to understand something that is foreign to Terrans? That I barely understood myself?  How could I explain the bond fully to you when I didn’t trust you to accept it?”

 

Jim jumped to his feet and glared down at Spock “By giving me the benefit of the doubt.”

Not giving Spock a chance to speak, Jim paced angrily.  “Hell Spock even if we weren’t friends you should have at least tried to trust me. We could have figured it out together.  Have I ever flinched when we melded before?  Did I ever run screaming for the hills when you told me you were telepathic?”

 

“No you did not and I didn’t realize how illogical I was being until I spoke with Sarek last night.” 

 

Jim almost stumbled over a cushion as he regarded Spock in surprise.

 

Spock looked at Jim solemnly.  “My father pointed out most of what you have said.  He also suggested I should trust in my bond mate and I do agree with him.  I owe you an apology Jim.” 

 

Flabbergasted.  Yep that’s how Jim felt at the moment.  Sarek had defended him, and Spock was apologizing, the world must be ending.  Plopping down on the cushions, he gazed at Spock in confusion.  “Ok what did you do with my First Officer?”

 

“What do you mean Jim I am right here.”

 

Jim shook his head furiously.  A blond lock plopped on his forehead.  “No way.  You never apologize.  In fact I have never heard it pass your lips!”

 

Spock was regarding Jim as if he had lost his mind.  “I have in fact apologized before Captain.”

 

“OK fine, but it’s hard to believe.” Jim muttered.  He ignored the weird look Spock was giving him.  “Alright apology accepted, just don’t keep something this important from me again.”

 

“Very well.

 

“Now onto this bond thing.  You are going to explain it in detail this time and no more beating around the bush right?”

 

“Why would I beat around the bush Jim? Isn’t it more effective to just walk around it?”

“Never mind.” Jim could swear Spock was messing with him, but he just couldn’t prove it.  “Just explain the bond since I only know a little bit about it from the Starfleet archives.”  And from another Vulcan of mutual acquaintance whose name he wouldn’t mention.

 

Spock seemed to gather his thoughts before speaking.  “It is a deep commitment made between two individuals for life or until death takes one of them.  They will feel each other emotions and thoughts.  No secrets can be hidden between them.  They are equal and yet one soul”

 

Jim listened intently as each word Spock spoke resounded in his head. The words sound ancient and powerful.  Each word impacted in his mind and made him realize the serious situation he was in. 

 

He was in a committed relationship for life with Spock until one of them died.  There was no way to escape the bond, since Lady T’Fon could not break it.   Everything he thought or felt, Spock would know. 

 

The word commitment usually scared him with a capital T for terror, which could be why none of his previous relationships had lasted long.  He didn’t know how to take it all in.  That he James Tiberius Kirk was in a committed relationship with Spock of Vulcan.  If he hadn’t been sitting down he would have fallen down.  Funny during the months that he had been on the ship with Spock he had never really thought about the bond as permanent.  He had always believed that it was going to be broken, but Spock had never promised it would be.  All the Vulcan had said was to go to his new home world to see a healer.  It was just something he was going to have to deal with.  Accept that he was bonded to a male Vulcan.  Talk about a life altering event that just now made an impact on him. 

 

The memory of kissing Spock’s hand popped up into his mind.  He could feel himself blushing and cursed in his brain.  Damn his fair complexion he bet he looked like a cherry tomato.  Why did that memory pop up now?  Jim couldn’t help but wonder about it.  It had been instinctive to kiss Spock’s hand when he had touched his face.  Could it be that he was attracted to Spock? That the passionate dreams were trying to tell him something? He was so confused that he wanted to slap his forehead in frustration!

 

“Are you alright Jim?” Spock asked quietly.

 

Snapping his head up, Jim nodded vigorously.  “I’m fine Spock!”

 

Somehow he doubted the Vulcan bought his white lie, but he was glad when he wasn’t called on it.  Shoving thoughts of the kiss and other things aside, he decided to discuss this with Bones later over a bottle of tequila, or something stronger.

 

Spock was highly skeptical of the Captain being fine.  The telling red blush against the pale skin and the dilating pupils gave him away.    He was quiet curious to know just what the Captain was thinking about, but he doubted that he would receive a straight answer. 

 

“Are you ready for the next part Jim?”

 

“Next part?”  Jim asked in confusion.

 

“Yes for me to drop my shields.” Spock spread his fingers out on his legs. “If there is to be trust between us then I must let you feel my emotions.  My logic.  My very being.”

 

A flustered look passed over Jim’s face. “Are you sure that’s a good idea Spock? I mean we just acknowledged that this is a permanent bond. Shouldn’t we wait a few days to give us both some time to adjust to this new situation?” Jim swallowed hard.  If Spock dropped his shield then he would know what he was thinking right now.  It could prove disastrous!

 

Spock shot the Captain a puzzled look.  Why was Jim protesting this so hard?  “This is a perfect time to do it Jim since we are currently on shore leave.  Unless there is another reason?”

 

Jim frantically racked his mind before an idea occurred to him. He thought hard about McCoy and how evil the doctor was.  All the hyposprays and the allergic reactions he had.  Every evil thing they doctor had done to keep him in sickbay.  Soon the blush he had faded and all thoughts of the kiss were gone.  Nothing like thinking about his evil friend’s bedside manner, to kill any good, or embarrassing thoughts.

 

“Why nothing is wrong Spock,” Jim said pleasantly. “I am sorry I just felt a little nervous about our situation.  Everything is alright so go on and drop your shield.”

 

“We will do this in stages Jim.”

 

“Stages?” Jim asked curiously.

 

“Yes.  When time permits, I will let my shield down so we both may adjust to being in each other minds.”

 

“Why not all at once?”

 

“If I left my shields down between us all the time it would overwhelm us both.  We would become confused by each other thoughts and emotions.”

 

Jim couldn’t help but nod at this wisdom.  He was surprised when Spock held out his hand to him.  The pale hand was turned with the palm facing up. 

 

“If you will give me your hand Jim we can proceed.”

 

Jim placed his hand in Spock’s, which felt warm and the long fingers curved around his own.  Smiling at Spock, Jim nodded.  “Go ahead Spock.”

 

Dark brown eyes closed as Spock slowly released the shield he had placed over the bond.  Jim’s thoughts and emotions burst into his mind like a star going nova   Brilliant and quiet sudden.  He could feel Jim’s astonishment and apprehension at the bond being open.  His wonder of experiencing something new and his nervousness of what Spock must think of his human emotions.   The burning need to understand Spock and the bond that was now permanent.

 

Jim was quiet astonished by the bond.  Being able to feel Spock through the bond was a new experience.  The Vulcan’s emotions, were calm and cool like a deep dark pool, and yet a ripple could cause waves.  Spock’s thinking was so precise and detailed.  It reminded him of a well oiled machine or an advanced computer.  He could feel Spock’s amusement at the thought.   

 

Spock concluded that was enough for there first session.  Carefully closing the bond, he gently lowered his shield.  He watched as Jim seemed to blink dazedly before looking at him.

 

“Why did you stop Spock?”  Jim smiled.  “It was getting interesting.”

 

“It was a most fascinating experience Jim, but I did not was to overwhelm either of us on our first attempt.”

 

It would be an experience that Jim would not soon forget.  He couldn’t wait till the next session when he would get the chance to explore there bond further.  Who knew Spock had such an interesting mind.

 

“Now Jim are you ready for the next stage or are you to fatigued?”

 

Jim shook his head. He felt a bit tired, but not overlay so.   “No I am fine what else do you have planned.”

 

Spock gave him a small smile.  “Shielding Jim.  It would benefit us both if you would learn to do it.  In doing so, you will learn to guard your thoughts or emotions from me if you wished.”

 

Jim couldn’t help but agree.  He didn’t always want Spock to always know what he was thinking especially if it was something embarrassing or confidential.  “Sure Spock what will I have to do?”

 

“We shall mind meld and I will teach you the basics of shielding.”  Spock placed his fingers over the necessary points on the side of Jim’s face. “But I must warn you it won’t be easy.  It will take time and training.”

 

Jim nodded and waited for Spock to proceed. He had a feeling that learning how to shield was going to be a trying and difficult experience. Hopefully he wouldn’t take forever to learn it, but he never had been good at meditating.  If shielding was the same as meditation he was so screwed. Jim listened to the familiar words and let himself fall into the meld. 

 

---

 

Chapter 10: Confessions

 

The sand crunched under her black boots as Nyota walked down the city streets of Shi'Kahr.  Her long black ponytail swung behind her and her green dress floated around her shapely thighs.  Black eyes looked around in curiosity and a half smile curved her full pink lips.  She had been sightseeing around the city since she had been on shore leave.  The capital city had many wonderful and fascinating places to visit.  There were different types of museums, shops, gardens, and even an advanced communication conference was being held on the planet.  She had been quiet interested in taking the tour of the forest near the city.  Sulu had mentioned in enthusiasm that there was interesting plant life and creatures in the forest next to the city.  He and Chekov were suppose to join her on that outing, but had become indisposed somehow.  Although knowing those two, she bet they gotten into some kind of mischief.  Probably Scotty was involved or maybe McCoy.  Luckily Christine Chapel had been free to go and was going to meet her at the tour place.  Glancing at her watch, she had about two more hours before she had to meet her there.  Loud rambunctious laughter echoed nearby and she looked around in confusion.  Nyota couldn’t help but notice something was familiar about that laugh.  There weren’t too many humans wandering around and she was doubtfully that it was a Vulcan. She finally spotted the person and stopped.  Her black eyes widened in surprise.

 

Captain Kirk stood next to Spock and was chatting with him near a cafe which was nothing out of the norm.  The two of them had begun to spend more time together recently and seemed to be developing a good friendship. It was the unguarded attentive expression on Spock’s features that had caught her attention. She had never seen Spock look that way with anyone but her before and it made her a little jealous.  When Jim placed a hand on Spock’s shoulder and the Vulcan didn’t move away, bitterness hit Nyota hard.   It had been a few years since they had broken up amblically, but still the hurt lingered.  She decided it was time to go before either of them spotted her.  Now wasn’t the time to make small talk.

 

“Uhura!”

 

Stopping in her tracks and thinking the gods were against her, Nyota turned around.  The Captain was motioning her over to them.  She let out a sigh and pasted a fake smile on her face.

 

“Hello Captain, Spock.  Are you two enjoying your shore leave?”

 

A huge grin lit up the Captain’s features.  “I have to say it has been the most enlightening and interesting shore leave I have ever been on.”

 

Nyota was puzzled by the Captain’s response. “I see.”

 

An awkward silence descended on them and Nyota shifted uncomfortably.  It was still to soon to be near Spock since things between them was still so strained.  She could tell Spock was uncomfortable as well judging by the way he wouldn’t look at her.

 

Jim almost sighed in annoyance.  His day had been going pretty well when he had asked Spock to show him around Vulcan II.  Finally things were settling between them and there friendship was starting to flourish.  They had been discussing what to eat for lunch when he had seen Nyota.  He had thought it was would be nice to invite her to eat with them, but apparently that had been a bad idea.  It looked like those two were still avoiding each other like the plague.  He had hoped they had finally settled things, but it didn’t appear so.  Nyota looked like she was being forced to face an unwanted relative she hated and he could feel Spock’s tension emitting off him in waves.  Thank goodness Spock had shielded on his side of the bond since he really didn’t want to feel whatever was causing that tension.  Growing more annoyed by the second he decided it was time to make them deal with this.  Normally he stayed out of ex-couples disputes, but dammit they were on his ship, and he didn’t want this to affect them if they were sent on a mission together.  Emotions were hard to control normally, but when there was some bitterness, or unresolved issues it could cause serious trouble down the road.

 

“Alright you two need to settle your differences.”  Jim said determinedly.  He watched them both start in surprise.  “And don’t give me a lie about there being nothing wrong.  The tension between you is so thick you would need a phaser rifle to cut through it!”

 

“Captain I don’t see how any of this is your business.”  Nyota spoke angrily.

 

“Yes it is!  If this is how you two act now then what about when you are on a mission?”  Jim glared at Uhura until she flinched. “Can you honestly say you two could work together right now without it causing you trouble?”

 

Jim waited for either of them to respond, but wasn’t surprise when they didn’t. They both had to know he was right and they needed to resolve this issue.    He looked at Spock and noticed he was regarding him with a reserved expression.  Jim was unsure what Spock was thinking.  There friendship was still to new for him to be able to read his expression or body language.  Squaring his shoulders he looked at them both. 

 

“I want you two to take a walk and settle this situation right now.”

 

“Jim….”

 

“Captain….”

 

“No buts!  Settle this now that’s an order!”  Jim all but shouted.  He glared at them both before stalking off.  Hopefully they would settle this situation because he sure hated getting involved.

 

Spock watched the Captain stalk away and his lips turned down a bit.  He had enjoyed showing Jim the sites around the city, discovering new places, and spending time with his bond mate.  Things between them were finally smoothing over since there talk and there budding friendship was flourishing.  He had thought he would be spending a relaxing lunch with Jim and getting to know him better.  It hadn’t turned out that way when Jim had spotted Nyota.  There were many unresolved issues between them and he knew he should not have left it alone for so long.  It was illogical to let feelings affect there working relationship, but sometimes emotions could overrule logic.  Perhaps the captain was right and it was time for them to talk about it.

 

Nyota seemed to be thinking the same thing as she pointed across the street. “Should we talk over there Spock?”  Nestled in between two buildings was a rock garden that was deserted. “Our discussion would be more private.”

 

“Agreed.”

 

The two of them walked across the street and entered the gardens.  Huge rocks with different minerals embedded in them, were arranged along the pathway and a few benches were scattered around. 

 

Nyota stopped near a bench before looking at Spock.  “The Captain is right even though I hate admitting that.”

 

Spock inclined his head.  “Yes he can be infuriating when he wants to be.”

 

“I am sorry Spock.”  Nyota said suddenly.  She was looking down at her boots.  “It is my fault that the tension between us is so bad.  I should never have let my feelings affect our working relationship.”

 

“It is illogical to only blame yourself Nyota. I am also at fault for letting things deteriorate so badly between us.”

 

“No this time I have to take the blame Spock.”  Nyota said sadly.  “I never gave you the chance to explain your side of the story.  I was to hurt to listen to you and to angry to care at the time.” Determined black eyes looked at Spock.  “Can you tell me the reason now?”

 

“You wanted more then I could give you Nyota.”  Spock sat down on the bench.  “I was not ready to form a lasting commitment with you even though I knew it was something that you wanted.”

 

A tear slid down Nyota’s cheek.  “Yes it was because I loved you.  I wanted to spend forever with you.”

 

“I cared for you as well Nyota.”

 

“You can say it Spock.”  Nyota sat down next to Spock.  She draped her hands on her knees and looked at the dusty ground.  “I kept pushing you to much to get you to commit and backed you into a corner.”

 

“It was frustrating that you would not give me the chance to explain to you.”

 

“Yes I was too emotional to listen and then I ended it.” Nyota whispered.  “I destroyed our relationship in my anguish and stupidity.  I didn’t seek you out and let you explain because of my foolishness.” A warm arm encircled her shoulders and she leaned against him.  “I am so sorry Spock I wish hadn’t done that.”

 

Spock hugged her gently.  “It is alright Nyota. Human emotions can be quiet illogical at times.”

 

Nyota let out a tear filled chuckle at such a logical response. She wiped a few tears away and moved away from the hug.  Nyota did feel better after hearing Spock’s side of the story at last.  Even though her foolishness had cost her a good relationship, she was glad that she now understood why Spock hadn’t wanted to marry her.  If only she hadn’t kept pushing him for a response and had instead listened to him with her head and not her emotions. Taking a deep breath, she held a hand out to him.  “Shall we start over Spock and become friends again?”

 

Spock clasped her hand warmly.  “I would be honored.”

 

~

 

Jim strolled along the street peering into the shops curiously.  He had been wandering the streets for over an hour since leaving Uhura and Spock.  Hopefully those two settled things or else he would sick McCoy on them.  Nothing like having an evil doctor breathing down your neck to make people see reason.  He knew Bones loved to torment people especially Spock. His stomach decided to let out a vicious growl and he decided he better find something to eat soon.

 

“Hello Jim.” said a deep gravelly voice.

 

Turning around, Jim’s smile became brilliant and he leapt at the older Vulcan.  “Spock it is good to see you!”

 

“It is good to see you as well.” Spock hugged Jim in return.  “You have forgotten I am called Selek now.”

 

“Oops I did forget.”

 

He needed to remember to call him Selek now and not Spock.  It was less confusing for everyone in the long run, but it was going to be difficult to remember.  A discreet cough jerked them apart.  An older Vulcan woman was looking at them in disapproval before walking away.  Jim looked at Spock and let out a laugh.  Vulacns never did like public displays of emotions.

 

“I guess this isn’t the most appropriate place to hug you.”

 

“Indeed.  We will gain more disapproving looks if we continue to display such emotions.” Selek gestured to a café nearby.  “Would you care to join me for a meal?”

 

“I would be delighted.”

 

The two of them sat down outside and quickly ordered what they wanted.  Once the waiter had left, Jim looked at Selek happily.   The Vulcan had more grays added to his black hair, a few more lines on his face, but the eyes still shown with intelligence. It had been a few years since he had seen Selek and although they kept in touch through messages it just wasn’t the same.  Seeing each other in the flesh was a thousand times better then on a view screen.

 

Selek took a sip of his water.  “From our last correspondence you did not mention your visit to Vulcan II.”

 

“Ya I didn’t think I would be coming out this way anytime soon.  Starfleet decided to release me on good behavior.”

 

Selek gave him a disbelieving look.  “Somehow I find that hard to believe.”

 

Jim grinned innocently, “I was surprised to see you on Vulcan II aren’t you suppose to be off world or something?”

 

“Yes I returned ten days ago from a trip to Earth.”

 

“Still doing administrative work for the ambassador?”

 

“Yes Jim.”  A small smile appeared on Selek’s thin lips.  “It is not very stimulating job but it has its rewards.”

 

Jim gave Selek a skeptical look but made no comment. The waiter reappeared and placed there food on the table. Jim couldn’t help but grimace at the sight of Selek’s food.

 

“Plomeek soup?  Why do you both like that stuff?”

 

“It is quiet good Jim and nutritious.”  Selek arched a slim eyebrow, “Have you partaken it?”

 

“Hell no it smells bad and it’s orange!”

 

Selek sighed.  “It does not as you say smell bad and the color is pleasing to the eye.”

 

“Pleasing to the eye?”  Jim chuckled and pointed at the soup.  “It such a neon orange that I am surprised it hasn’t blinded you.”

 

Selek let out a suffering sigh.  The soup was quiet pleasing to the palette although he did agree that it was a bit bright. 

 

Jim speared a piece of veggie that reminded him of purple broccoli.  He began to crunch on it while gazing at Selek.  It was great to see his friend again and he should visit him more often.  A sudden thought popped in his head.  He had not informed Selek of his bonding with the other Spock yet.  There had been no time and of course a few days ago he had thought it could be broken.  He still wasn’t ready to inform anyone at this time besides those who needed to know, but maybe he could ask Selek a few questions.  Hopefully he wouldn’t ask him why he was being so nosy.  He just had to be subtle to avoid being asked questions, but he sucked at subtle.

 

“Selek where you ever bonded to anyone before?”

 

“Briefly.” Selek looked at him in puzzlement.  “Why do you ask?”

 

Jim threw Selek an innocent smile.  “Oh no reason I am just curious.”  He could tell Selek wasn’t really buying that comment. “Was it a male?”

 

Dark brown eyes widened in surprise.  “No it was a Vulcan woman and her name was T’Pring.”

 

“Ah.”  Jim took a deep breath and decided to just be blunt.  What could it hurt?  “Were you ever bonded or in a relationship with the other Jim of your time.”

 

Selek carefully placed his spoon down into the bowl.  Dabbing at his lip with a napkin, he eyed Jim curiously. He wondered about the questions and why Jim was asking them.  It was most odd.  “No.  We were close as brothers but never did I entertain the idea of being in a relationship with him.”

 

Damn!  Looks like he couldn’t ask Selek any more questions now.  He had been hoping that Spock and Jim from the other universe had been in a relationship.  Then he could have asked questions.

 

“What’s this about Jim?”

 

Jim looked into concerned dark brown eyes and sighed.  Guess he had better tell him.  No use beating around the bush anymore since his unsubtle questions had probably confused the poor guy.  Jim explained to Selek what had happened between him and his younger counterpart.  The bond, the problems, and of course there budding friendship.   He finally came to the end of his story and waited for Selek to reply.

 

“It seems that you and my younger version have had some interesting adventures recently.”  Selek said dryly.

 

“Yes good times. I know I signed up for some perilous and entertaining missions, but this takes the cake.” Jim said jokingly.

 

“Indeed.”

 

“I was hoping that you and the other me were in a relationship.”  Jim smiled at his friend.  “That way I could ask you for some advice.”

 

“What kind of advice my friend?” Selek asked curiously.

 

A blush tainted Jim’s cheeks. If he couldn’t tell this to Selek then who could he tell? 

Normally he would have spoken to Bones about something this important, but not now.  He had already confessed about the dreams to Bones which was bad enough, but not about this new budding attraction that he was developing towards Spock.   It was to embarrassing at the moment to confess to his oldest friend and he was in no mood to deal with a hysterical doctor.

 

“I have had a feel intimate dreams about your younger self and of course kissing his hand was a bit of a shock.”

 

Spock looked at him in bemusement. “I see.”

 

“And I don’t know what’s going on!”  Jim let out an explosive sigh.  “It’s been driving me nuts for a while.  Are the dreams and the kiss telling me I am attracted to Spock? That I want a relationship with him other then friendship? And here I thought I only wanted women.”

 

Selek was not upset by this revelation and was more surprised then anything.  Who would have thought that this Jim and Spock were bonded?  This alternate universe was developing in a most fascinating manner.  He wondered what his Jim would have thought about this situation and he could imagine his friend laughing hysterically over it.

 

““It is alright Jim.”  Selek waited until Jim looked at him.  “There is nothing wrong with being attracted to my younger self.  You are probably discovering things about him that are stimulating to you and the dreams are a way for your subconscious to let you know.”  A quiet chuckle left Selek.  “And as for women I doubt you have stopped finding them attractive.”

 

Jim smiled lopsidedly at Selek.  “Thanks Selek. Sorry for dumping this all on you.  I just didn’t know who else to turn too.”

 

“Then it is good that I was here for you.”  Selek gently grasped Jim’s hand.  “Jim take your time to grow accustomed to these new feelings.  Do not rush them and let it happen naturally.”

 

Jim nodded.  “Oh don’t worry I am in no rush.  Plus we are slowly developing a good friendship and I don’t want to jeopardize it.”

 

“Jim there is one thing I haven’t asked you.”

 

“What is it Selek?”

 

“Do you know if my younger self feels the same way?”

 

Jim contemplated the question for a moment before slowly nodding.  “Yes I think so.  He didn’t jerk his hand away when I kissed it.”

 

“Then do not worry everything will work out fine.”

 

“I hope your right Selek.”  Jim smiled brightly. “Now eat your Plomeek soup before it gets cold.”

 

Selek arched an eyebrow.  “But Jim it’s supposed to be cold.”

 

--

 

Chapter 11: Unusual Situation

 

Red.  It was bigger then his fist, had weird fur all over its body, and it was just so red.   Jim couldn’t help but shake his head.  What was up with this planet and the color red?   Christine Chapel who had been standing next to him let out a sudden shriek when she had seen the bug and fainted.  Jim couldn’t help but roll his eyes as Spock caught her.  She was the most competent nurse on the whole ship, but show her a giant nasty bug and she fainted. Not that he could blame her.  There had been so many giant bugs in here that even he was starting to get the willies.

 

Uhura had stopped next to Spock and was gazing down at Christine in exasperation.  “Does that make the fifth faint so far Spock?”  

 

Spock inclined his head. “Yes Nyota, I estimate she will awaken in 5.2 minutes.”

 

Jiim watched as Spock swung Christine up into his arms and started walking.  It was still surprising to see Spock touch someone since he usually disliked touching anyone.  Plus who would have known that Spock was so chivalrous?  The Vulcan had not complained once every time he had to carry Christine and she wasn’t a light woman. He wondered just how much could his first officer lift without breaking a sweat?  The red furry bug was moving and Jim stared at it.  Creepy.

 

“Is the red bug that interesting to you Mister Kirk?”

 

Jim flinched and shook his head rapidly.  “Oh no, no, Sevon I was just feeling a bit fatigued from the heat.  Let’s move one”

 

Sevon stared at him intently before nodding.  He was skinny little Vulcan dressed in a dark green outfit, with short black hair, and had cold beady black eyes.   In one hand Sevon carried a Data pad and the other a Tricorder.  Sevon reminded Jim of nerdy stuck up bookworm. 

 

Jim let out a relieved sigh when Sevon followed after Spock. If Jim even hinted that he was staring at the red bug then there Vulcan guide would launch into a lecture of epic proportions that would last for over an hour.  He didn’t want to know what the thing ate, how old it possible was, or for gods sake how much it weighed.  Although knowing Spock, he would be interested in listening to every word, but Jim was not.  Sevon spoke in a monotone voice that was boring as hell.   

 

Swiping at his sweaty brow, Jim stalked after them.   He couldn’t help but wonder how he had let himself get talked into this. Jim hadn’t known that by sending Uhura and Spock to patch things up that he would be going on this wild jungle expedition.  After leaving Selek who he had a pleasant lunch with he had wandered back to were he had left them.  He had been surprised at seeing Christine Chapel standing next to Uhura.  Christine had been staring at Spock as usually with a look of adoration and the Vulcan was ignoring it.  Jim had been pleased at the relaxed conversation flowing between Uhura and Spock.  Whatever they had talked about had finally started to mended there problems and they were almost talking like old friends again.  Of course his good mood had faded quickly when Uhura had looked over at him with a Cheshire grin.  When she smiled at Jim in that manner it usually meant bad news for him.  Really really bad news.  Something that he was going to hate or get dragged into against his will.

 

“Hello Captain how was your lunch?”  Uhura asked sweetly.

 

Jim pasted a fake smile on his face. “Oh it was fine, I had lunch with an old friend.”

 

Spock was looking at Jim in curiously. “Old friend…..” 

 

Uhura cut Spock off before he could say more with a wave of her hand.  “Well good but Captain I wanted to ask you something if I may.”

 

Spock gave Uhura a surprised look, but subsided.

 

“Um sure.”  Jim felt a trickle of sweat run down the side of face. This wasn’t good Uhura rarely cut off Spock.

 

“You and Spock are going on an adventure with me and Christine into the Shi'Kahr forest!”

 

Three sets of eyes looked at Jim expectantly and he was surprised Christine had torn her eyes away from Spock long enough to look at him too. He had wanted to visit the forest ever since he had heard it was teaming with mysterious creatures and probably other wonderful things.  Of course he also remembered that Bones had forbidden him entry into the forest.  Something about giving him bodily injury if he so much as stepped into the woods followed by multiple hyposprays.  Apparently his CMO had done his own research before there arrival on Vulcan II and there were probably critters in the forest that could cause Jim to have an allergic reaction.  Bad allergic reactions.  The Doctor had not gotten the chance to inoculate him against anything in there which was why he was forbidden entry into the forest.  He was about to say explain this when he glanced at Spock.  His friend was looking at him impassively, but for some reason he had a feeling Spock would be disappointed if he said no.  He didn’t know why he knew this but he did.  Oddly the thought of making Spock disappointed twisted something inside of him and he sighed.

 

“So when do we leave?”

 

Jim swatted at another bug.  He could feel the bite starting to itch and wanted to curse a blue streak. Stupid allergies.   So that’s how he had ended up in this situation and when Bones found out he was a dead man.

 

“Are you coming Jim?”

 

Spock was standing a few feet away and he was smiling slightly.  Jim felt his heart do an odd flop in his chest.  He wondered if the heat or his allergies were getting to him. In a few strides he stopped next to Spock and smiled.  He could see Christine a little ways ahead with Uhura and there guide Sevon.  It looked like Christine had finally woken up from her faint.  More trees, bushes, and bugs awaited them.  Jim gestured for Spock to precede him.  “Sure Spock lets go.”

 

Spock walked ahead of his Captain and looked around. This was the first time he had gotten a chance to explore the forest of Shi'Kahr and he was quiet pleased that he had accepted Nyota’s invitation.  Normally when he visited Vulcan II he only had time to visit his father, some of his extended family, and the newly established science academy.  There had been no time to investigate the Vulcans new home world until this shore leave.  Hopefully in the future, he would get the chance to explore further and find more fascinating wonders to analyze. 

 

The vegetation grew thicker as they walked further into the forest.  Sevon began to explain to the three humans about some of the flowering plants while Spock listened attentively.  He was fascinated by the plant life surrounding them and wondered what types of species roamed the forest.  On Vulcan I there had never been lush forests like these since there planet was mostly covered in deserts with scattered bodies of water. There had been rainfall but never enough to create vegetation like this great forest unless his people cultivated the land.  Spock stopped to gaze at an interesting flower with several colors on its petals.  A strange beetle rested inside and he looked at it in curiosity.

 

Jim was not as fascinated by the forest as his companions were.  He itched from several bites and he felt like he was sweating bullets.  It felt like the forest was out to get him and he could swear that red bug from earlier was stalking him.  Every time he stopped to rest near a tree, he would spot a red bug and he could swear its beady black eyes were watching him.  Walking a few feet away from the others, he stopped and gazed at the canopy above.  Sunlight trickled weakly through the leaves and he could almost see the sky.  A biting sensation on his left leg caught his attention and he glanced down.  Cursing a blue streak, he jumped back and swatted at his pant leg angrily.  Of all the luck, he would be the only one to stand in what looked to be an angry red ant pile and get eaten alive.  He was right the red bugs of Vulcan were out to get him.  A strange sensation rippled through him and he staggered.  He had a bad feeling he was having an allergic reaction far away from his CMO.  Bones was going to kill him.

 

Uhura who had been admiring some flowers nearby, noticed her Captain’s suddenly white face.  When he staggered she rushed to his side.  “Captain!”

 

Hearing Nyota’s shout Spock’s head snapped up. Even from a few feet away, he could see Jim’s eyes were dilated and his cheeks were flushed.   Jim began to stagger and he rushed to his side.  Spock immediately helped Nyota support there sagging Captain.  “Are you alright Captain?”

 

Jim tipped his head back and tried to smile reassuringly at Spock.  “I am fine Spock just a little dizzy.”

 

Closer up, Jim’s eyes were mostly pupil with a ring of gold surrounding them.  Spock felt uneasy the longer he gazed down into them.  He could feel Jim trembling against his fingers which was highly unusual. 

 

Christine rushed over to them and grasped Jim’s wrist to check his pulse. The blue eyes narrowed in thought, “Captain did you by chance get inoculated before coming into this forest?”

 

“Well…...”  He would have said more but the world was spinning around dizzily.  Jim let out a small gasp.  Looks like either the ants were the final straw or else one of the plants was causing an allergic reaction.  Damn his allergies.

 

“Jim?”

 

Hearing the concern in Spock’s voiced, he looked up into his friend’s worried eyes.  “Sorry Spock but I think I have ruined our forest exploration.”

 

---

 

Jim studied himself in the mirror as he prepared himself for dinner.  He was still a bit flushed on his face and few bumps remained from his allergy attack.  Tilting his head to the side, he could see an angry mark left from a hypospray Bones had used on him earlier.  Who knew a bite could cause so much trouble?  Of course it was his own damn fault.  If he insisted on Bones inoculating him none of this would have happened and certain people would not be angry at him. He hadn’t noticed he was having a severe allergic reaction until he had begun to sway on his feet and Uhura had shouted his name.  Christine had been seriously worried, and after doing a though check on him, she had immediately told Uhura to contact McCoy on the communicator.   Of course Spock had taken the drastic approach when he begun to have difficulty breathing and carried him out of the forest.  Poor Sevon had trailed after them trying to be helpful, but scientific facts were useless at the time.   

 

McCoy had been infuriated when he had rushed to Spock’s home.  A few choice words about Jim being a stupid fool, followed by a vicious jab with the hypo, had let Jim know that Bones was going to be angry for quiet some time.  It was would take a bottle of expensive brandy and a lot of groveling before Bones would forgive him. 

 

Spock had not been pleased with Jim either after McCoy had given him the riot act.   He was in charge of making sure Jim stayed out of trouble and he had failed.  Jim had tried explaining to Bones that it hadn’t been Spock’s fault, but his words had fallen on death ears.  The words Bones had spoken still caused his ears to burn in embarrassment.  Who knew McCoy knew so many colorful obscenities.

 

Jim brushed his blond hair back and straightened his green tunic.  A knock at the door had him glancing at the chronometer on the dresser.  It looked like it was time for dinner and Spock had come for him.  They were supposed to be eating dinner with Sarek tonight for the first time.  The ambassador had been very busy and had finally gotten free time to spend with his son.  Jim was feeling a bit nervous about dining with Spock’s father since he was kind of like his father in law to him?  It was going to be an awkward night.

 

Walking towards the door, Jim took a deep breath and let it out slowly.  Hopefully Spock would have forgiven him, but he somehow doubted it.  Opening the door, Jim couldn’t help but notice Spock looked very attractive.  The Vulcan was dressed in a long black sweater, with red V patterns, and black slacks.  He smiled tentatively at Spock, but it was not returned.

 

“Good evening Jim,” Spock said coolly. “Are you ready to proceed to dinner?”

 

Jim winced, “Sure Spock.”

 

It looked like Spock was still angry at him and would be for sometime.  He followed Spock out of the door and down the hallway.  It didn’t take long before he was led into another room he had never been in and it looked like a formal dining room.  A dark wooden table dominated the room with food spread upon it.  The smells coming from the different dishes made him realize how hungry he was. 

 

Sarek dressed in dark blue robes walked towards them.  He stopped a few paces away and raised his hand in the Vulcan greeting.  Jim tried to mimic him, but he was only partially successful.  He never could get his fingers to successfully form the V no matter how much he practiced.

 

“Greetings Captain.  It is an honor that you dine with us tonight.  It is unfortunate I have not had a chance to greet you properly.”

 

“It is quiet alright Ambassador,” Jim smiled at him charmingly, “You are a busy man which is understandable.”

 

“Please call me Sarek we are…..family now.”

 

Jim ignored the slight hesitation.  “Alright if that is your wish Sarek.”  He was glad that he hadn’t been told to call him father since that would have felt awkward. Not that he could ever see himself calling Sarek father even if he had been given permission. A light touch on his arm had him glancing up at Spock.

 

“Let us be seated Jim.”

 

The three of them sat down at the table with Spock on Jim’s left and Sarek across from them.  Jim glanced down and almost grimaced.  A familiar orange soup rested in front of him with pieces of potato floating in it. 

 

“Is it not to your taste Captain?” Sarek inquired.

 

Jim snapped his head up and realized that Sarek and Spock had both stopped eating.  He wondered just how long he had been staring at his soup.   “Please call me Jim, Sarek and the soup is fine” 

 

“Are you sure Jim?”  Spock had raised an eyebrow. 

 

“Yes it’s alright Spock.”  Jim did not for anything in the world want to tell Sarek how much he disliked Plomeek.  It would be rude and he didn’t want to make a bad impression on Spock’s father. Jim gazed at the soup again before grabbing the spoon. Dipping the spoon into the orange liquid, he raised it to his lips and slipped it into his mouth.  It was a bit salty and tasted like carrots.  He had never been fond of carrots.  A fake smile appeared on his face.  “Not bad.” Somehow he knew that neither Spock nor Sarek believed him.

 

Spock was surprised that Jim had eaten some of the Plomeek soup.  It was the first time he could ever remember seeing the human eating it.  It was most disconcerting. A quiet cough across the table had Spock looking at his father. 

 

Sarek regarded them both serenely before speaking, “I have informed the family of your bond Spock.  Jim has been given full privileges benefiting his status as your bond-mate.”

 

“Privileges?”  Jim was looking at them both curiously.

 

“Yes Jim, since you became Spock’s bond-mate you have married into our family which grants you many privileges.” Sarek laced his fingers on the table. “Our family is not as big since Vulcan was destroyed, but we do own many organizations and resources still available off world. I have taken the liberty of asking T’Shar to add you as a minor voting member to the company boards.”

Jim looked at Spock in confusion.  “T’Shar?”

“Yes T’Shar is the head matriarch of our family,” Spock explained to Jim,” she is also one of the top researchers in the medical field for Starfleet.”

“Oh wait I have heard of her,” Jim tapped his fingers on the table, “McCoy was telling me something about her curing a deadly plague on Daros IV.”

“Indeed.” Spock looked at Sarek, “Where is T’Shar at this time father?”

Sarek dabbed at his mouth with a napkin. “T’Shar is off world at this time conducting research on Starbase 2, she intends to meet you Jim, the next time you have a chance to visit Vulcan.” A small smile appeared on the Ambassadors lips. “She wishes to as you Terra’s say, show you off to her friends.”

Jim was startled by Sarek smiling. He had never seen the ambassador smile before, but maybe Vulcans only showed some emotions in front of there family?  Jim couldn’t help but be puzzled by Sarek’s comment, “Show me off?”

“Yes T’Shar is considered eccentric for a Vulcan.” Spock said dryly. “And it is the first time our family has had a Captain in Starfleet.”

“Ah I see.” 

Dinner became a silent affair as they finished the meal and adjoined to another room.  Low beige couches leaned against white walls, shelves had been carved into the walls with various knickknacks, with a few books resting in there depths.

Spock glanced at Jim as he sat down next to him on one of the couches.  The Captain was gazing around the room with rapt interest. He wasn’t too surprised, when Jim stood up to pursue one of the bookshelves. The anger he felt at Jim was slowly dissipating and he took a slow breath.  It was illogical to remain angry at Jim even though his Captain should have informed him of not being inoculated.  He would never have accepted Nyota’s invitation if he had known this important information, since he knew that Jim’s allergies would cause him serious harm.  Spock released another slow breath and let the anger go.

Dinner with his father had proceeded far better then he had expected.  He knew that his father had not been to happy with him for accidentally bonding with a human male, since no children would ever come from there union. Sarek had proved that he had accepted the bond by having Jim conducted into the family as his bond-mate   Spock was very pleased.  He would never be close to his father as he had been to his mother, but he still yearned for his approval. 

“Spock why didn’t you tell me you had book of sonnets by William Shakespeare?” Jim was grinning widely, “I love some of his sonnets.”

Spock stood up and looked over Jim’s shoulder.  “My mother loved his sonnets and she would read them to me when I was a child.”

Jim hesitantly touched Spock’s cheek Dark green eyes looked up at him sympathy.  “I know I said it before, but I am sorry for your loss.

Spock was surprised by the warm concern he could feel from Jim’s touch. He couldn’t help but gaze at Jim in wonder. The touch helped soothed the ache over his mother’s loss and he couldn’t help but cup Jim’s hand against his cheek.

“Thank you,” Spock said simply.

Sarek who had returned from the kitchen stopped at the doorway and held the tea tray firmly.  He watched the interaction between Spock and Jim. At first he had not been too pleased with his son’s bonding even when he knew it was an accident.  Bonding by accident was very rare and did not happen to often.  He hadn’t been too sure there bonding was going to work out, but now watching them together he could see a relationship more then friendship forming between them.  An eyebrow was raised as he contemplated what Amanda would have thought of his son’s new bond-mate. Somehow he could see her shrugging at him with a warm smile on her face.  Quietly turning around, he decided to leave his son and his bond-mate alone for now. 

---

TBC